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The Pastor's Wife
by Segun Olumide The Pastor's Wife Segun Olumide All rights reserved. Unless otherwise stated, all scriptures quoted in this book are from the King James Version of the Bible. KEYS TO OTHER BIBLE VERSIONS: AMP-The Amplified Bible NIV-New International Version TLB-The Living Bible Gideons-The Gideons International RSV-Revised Standard Version NCV-New Century Version Amplified Bible (AMP) Copyright 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation; New International Version (NIV) Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide. Living Bible (TLB) The Living Bible copyright 1971 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.; Revised Standard Version (RSV) Revised Standard Version of the Bible, copyright 1946, 1952, and 1971 the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.; New Century Version (NCV) The Holy Bible, New Century Version. Copyright 2005 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. 2014 The New Apostolic Movement 3rd Edition 2016 The New Apostolic Movement, E-mail: [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] +234-8161297781; +234-8142543796; +234-8053053578; + 234-7085951514. TABLE OF CONTENTS 1. SHE SHOULD NEVER BE APPOINTED OR ORDAINED INTO THE FIVEFOLD MINISTRY UNLESS SHE HAS SUCH A SPECIFIC CALL 2. SHE SHOULD COVER HER HUSBAND IN CONTINUED EFFECTIVE PRAYER 3. SHE SHOULD BE A MODEL OR EXAMPLE OF HOLY LIVING TO ALL WOMEN AS WELL AS ALL GIRLS IN THE CIRCLE OF HER INFLUENCE 4. HER MODE OF DRESS AND ADORNMENT WILL SET A STANDARD FOR OTHER WOMEN AND EVEN THE GIRLS UNDER HER HUSBAND'S PASTORATE 5. SHE SHOULD PROTECT HER MATRIMONIAL HOME FROM LADIES OR WOMEN FROM WITHIN OR OUTSIDE THE LOCAL CHURCH 6. SHE SHOULD MINISTER TO HER HUSBAND SPIRITUALLY, EMOTIONALLY, SEXUALLY, NUTRITIONALLY, MATERIALLY, AND SO ON 7. SHE SHOULD BE ALLOWED AND RELEASED TO FUNCTION MAXIMALLY IN THE AREA OF HER GIFT 8. BE A LEADER OR SUPPORTER OF THE WOMEN'S GROUP 9. GET THE WOMEN TRAINED DIRECTLY OR INDIRECTLY 10. ATTRACT PEOPLE TO CHRIST, DON'T REPEL THEM CHAPTER ONE SHE SHOULD NEVER BE APPOINTED OR ORDAINED INTO THE FIVEFOLD MINISTRY (AS AN APOSTLE, PROPHET, EVANGELIST, PASTOR OR TEACHER) UNLESS SHE HAS SUCH A SPECIFIC CALL. Paul warned that everyone should abide in their own original calling (1 Cor 7:20). Solomon wrote, "As a bird that wandereth from her nest, so is a man that wandereth from his place" (Pro 27:8). That means if you stray from your placement in God, you are like a wandering bird that has left its allotted place. I remember a prominent minister who appointed his wife as a co-pastor at the early stage of that local church. Eventually, he removed her from the office of a pastor because God never ordained her as a pastor. Sometimes God can call both husband and wife to be pastors, but a lot of times, a pastor simply imposes his wife helplessly on the congregation because he sees it as a family affair. Read 2 Chronicles 26:16-21 to understand that such a pastor is joking with the wrath of God upon himself and/or his family. Every pastor's wife should be herself. Somebody said, "If you want to be someone really special; be yourself!" "No one takes this honour upon himself; he must be called by God, just as Aaron was" (Heb 5:4, NIV). The founder of a church with branches in different places missed it some years ago. So in January of a particular year, I asked the Lord whether I should go and warn him. But the Lord did not give me a go-ahead. So I kept quiet. Before the end of that year, he was a dead man. So the church leaders eventually made the wife to replace him as the general overseer (G.O.). Then God showed me about twice that death was coming upon her. She was never ordained or anointed by God to occupy that position. If she had been wise, she would have rejected their dangerous position. Pro 14:12 (NIV) reveals: "There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death." The giftings and callings of God are holy things. And anyone who takes such holy thing that heaven does not give him or her is toying with destruction, death, sickness, poverty and so on (please study 1 Sam 13:7-14, 1Chron 13:7- 12, 1 Chron 15:2, 11-15). CHAPTER TWO SHE SHOULD COVER HER HUSBAND (THE PASTOR) IN CONTINUED EFFECTIVE PRAYER. Every pastor's wife must be praying fervent for her husband day and night. She should set days aside to fast for him. She should remember sinners and other saints, especially the church members in her prayer and fasting. Sadly, some pastors' wives are good at gossipping about their husbands who are pastors and about the church members at large, but poor at prayer and fasting. When they know the weaknesses of their husbands, instead of crying out to God to turn those weaknesses to strengths, they use them to condemn, abuse and discourage the men for whom God appointed them to be helpmates (Gen 2:18). The Scripture says, "The earnest (heartfelt, continued) prayer of a righteous man makes tremendous power available [dynamic in its working]" (James 5:16, AMP). An ex-occult man confessed in his book that at a time, he wanted to destroy a great man of God, but that minister's wife's prayer made his mission impossible! Thank God for praying wives but sorry for prayerless ones. A pastor came to report his wife to me some time ago. He wanted her to start attending our Sunday service because of the frustration she was causing him, so that she could learn some things that would help improve her character. She later came to see me but I didn't invite her to our Sunday service. Rather I took her through a lesson on intimacy with God. And I encouraged her to spend quality time with God in true worship and studying the Bible daily. Yes, Psalms 84:7 says, "They go from strength to strength, every one of them in Zion appeareth before God." Also James 4:8 reveals: "Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you." Dear Pastor's wife, you need to draw near to God daily so that He can draw near to you and infuse his strength into you. Some pastors' wives are too weak spiritually and emotionally to cover their husbands effectively because they don't have covenant time of communion with God daily. After some time, the pastor told me that his wife had changed and that whatever we used for her worked! I used nothing but the word of God. So I am encouraging every minister's wife to pick the most convenient time daily and get a suitable place in their house or compound or elsewhere to spend quality time with God daily, not once in a week, but every blessed day continuously. It may be very early in the morning as Jesus did. Mark 1:35 (NIV) reads: "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed." That was the secret of his strength and power. Similarly, Daniel 6:10 (NIV) speaks of Daniel that : "Three times a day he got down on his knees and prayed, giving thanks to his God, JUST AS HE HAD DONE BEFORE." That was Daniel's lifestyle. It says: "JUST AS HE HAD DONE BEFORE." It was a constant habit for him. No wonder he stood out in his generation. CHAPTER THREE SHE SHOULD BE A MODEL OR EXAMPLE OF HOLY LIVING TO ALL WOMEN AS WELL AS ALL GIRLS IN THE CIRCLE OF HER INFLUENCE. The Bible says, "but be an example (pattern) for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity " (1 Tim 4:12, AMP). For instance, if a pastor's wife gets angry easily or gossips about church members, then that will not only hinder her husband's pastoral ministry but also infect or pollute other church members with the spirit of anger or gossip. Yes. It is so easy for them, especially the women to catch the spirit of their pastor's wife. You are a pattern or model for them to follow. So the choice is yours to be a good or bad model or example for them. CHAPTER FOUR HER MODE OF DRESS AND ADORNMENT WILL SET A STANDARD FOR OTHER WOMEN AND EVEN THE GIRLS UNDER HER HUSBAND'S PASTORATE. Paul warned, "I also wants women to dress MODESTLY, WITH DECENCY and PROPRIETY, NOT WITH BRAIDED HAIR OR GOLD OR PEARLS OR EXPENSIVE CLOTHES" (1 Tim 2:9, NIV). Peter also admonished, "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as BRAIDED HAIR and the WEARING OF GOLD JEWELRY and FINE CLOTHES " (1 Pet 3:3, NIV). The servant of God, Margaret Amure that I wrote about earlier was condemned to hell because of hatred towards her husband, her wearing trousers, using jewellery and weave-on (or attachment) and make-up. She was told that part of the reasons why women are very few in heaven was due to their mode of dress and adornment. Other people have confirmed some of these things. You can google Mrs Carillo from Bolivia, Linda from Sierra Lone, Samuel Tega from Nigeria, and so on. For example, KJV renders "braided" in 1 Timothy 2:9 above as "broided." And that is from the Greek word "plegma" which according to Thayer's Greek Lexicon means "what is woven, plaited, or twisted together; a web, plait, braid." So this verse is saying women and girls should not have their hair woven, plaited, or twisted together. Nor should they wear gold (jewellery), pearls (suggestive of precious stones, beads and so on) and expensive clothes. God wants us to avoid artificial beauty. He wants us to be natural in our looks and to maintain that naturalness. He wants us to be natural and decent. Dear pastor's wife, there is no need for you to dress like a prostitute. Proverbs 7:10 talks about the dress of a prostitute. God warned in Hosea 2:3 (NLT), "Tell her to remove the prostitute's make-up from her face and the clothing that exposes her breast." It has been said that the only woman that painted her face in the Bible is Jezebel. The spirit of Jezebel has taken over some churches through the carelessness of the pastor and his dear wife (2 Kings 9:30, Deut 22:5). CHAPTER FIVE SHE SHOULD PROTECT HER MATRIMONIAL HOME FROM LADIES OR WOMEN FROM WITHIN OR OUTSIDE THE LOCAL CHURCH. Solomon wrote, "A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands" (Pro 14:1, NLT). When you see a pastor messing around with women, then check out the wife he has at home. She may be the type that exposes her husband unnecessarily to temptation from other women. She may be encouraging sexually provocatively dressed ladies to hang around her husband in the name of Christian love or she may be frustrating her husband by depriving him of sex or fighting the man for not having enough money, and so on. Ideally, they should restrict women in the church from frequenting their home except if it is unavoidable, especially in special cases. Women in church should be encouraged to see the pastor in the church office or premises, and not in his matrimonial home. Some of them may need to see the women leader or coordinator if she can handle their cases. Remember it was Sarai who carelessly opened the door for Abram to have sex with Hagar. In fact, the Scripture says, "And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now the LORD hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai. And Sarai Abram's wife took Hagar her maid the Egyptian, after Abram had dwelt ten years in the land of Canaan, AND GAVE HER TO HER HUSBAND ABRAM TO BE HIS WIFE " (Gen 16:2-3). Because women are weaker vessels, Satan can easily use them to destroy their husband's life and ministry. Eve brought evil to Adam. Job's wife almost wrecked his destiny when he asked him to curse God and die (Job 2:9-10). Lot's wife would have made him become a pillar of salt too. Ahab was a king. He was a leader of God's flock. But the Scripture says, "But there was none unto Ahab, which did sell himself to do wickedness in the sight of the LORD, WHOM JEZEBEL HIS WIFE STIRRED UP" (1 Kings 21:25). A good wife stirs up her husband to do good while an evil wife stirs up her husband to do evil (Mat 7:16-20). I remember a precious servant of God here in Lagos, Nigeria. The man is highly anointed in the prophetic. But sad to say, the church folded up through the evil his wife perpetrated. She ran away from home leaving their three children behind. The man re-married a church member and relocated to another place. He started a new church in the new location he went to. Now I don't support her running away and his remarrying. The man also missed in some places too. He confessed that he had been warned earlier by a prophet not to marry that first wife. And marrying her, he did not thoroughly disciple her but rather imposed her upon the church. Worst of all, he was teaching highly dangerous heresies like if one is fornicating and Jesus comes at the moment, one will still go with HIM, and so on. How many pastors' wives have walked away from their marriages because of issues that could be resolved? Some women in America, Africa, Asia, Australia, Europe and so on may think they have heaven's approval to walk away from their marriage of years because their husband has misbehaved. They are damn wrong. What does God's word say? Where is the place of true agape love? They should learn a hard lesson from the wife of Benny Hinn who for one reason or another left their marriage of many years. But when her eyes popped open she came back and they are now remarried. The Scripture says, 'Didn't the LORD make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife your youth. "FOR I HATE DIVORCE!" says the LORD, the God of Israel. "TO DIVORCE YOUR WIFE IS TO OVERWHELM HER WITH CRUELTY" says the LORD of Heaven's Armies. "So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife" ' (Malachi 2:15-16, NLT). The truth is many pastors' wives are full of worldliness, filthiness and corrupt thinking. They are immature spiritually, mentally and emotionally. They are half-baked cake. They are not thorough disciples. They are not trained or prepared to handle the responsibilities of a pastor's wife. They may love the glamour, fame, honour, power and prosperity connected to their husband's calling. But if the man makes a little mistake, they expose him to the whole world and abandon him calling him all kinds of names. Don't you know that LOVE ENDURES LONG, AND IS PATIENT AND KIND (1Cor 13:4, AMP)? If God were to handle them the way they are handling their husbands, do you think he will forgive them and endure their mistakes, faults and bad behaviour? CHAPTER SIX SHE SHOULD MINISTER TO HER HUSBAND SPIRITUALLY, EMOTIONALLY, SEXUALLY, NUTRITIONALLY, MATERIALLY, AND SO ON. A good wife should not starve her husband in any way. Thank God sex is a gift from God to humanity to be practised only in marriage for our protection as well as for other reasons. Some women are too sexually stingy to their husbands. Some of them are too spiritual to enjoy sex with their husbands. There is a difference between having sex and enjoying sex. [Please avoid oral sex (sex with mouth), manual sex (sex with hand), anal sex (sex with anus) and object sex (sex with objects like dildo, vibrator, banana, and so on). Practise only penile-vaginal sex in your marriage. Also men should avoid using all sex toys: fleshlight, prostate massager, cock ring, and so on.] A pastor's wife should study the Bible and read good books as well as listen to good CDs that will help her minister to her husband spiritually, emotionally, nutritionally, materially, sexually, and so on. Dear Pastor's wife, please make sure he rests well and does not overlabour himself fasting or counselling people. Also ensure that he eats a balanced diet daily, and that on time unless he is fasting. Create an atmosphere in your home in which he can relax, play, laugh and feel at home. Make sure he wears proper clothes with clean underwears. 10 THINGS EVERY SPOUSE SHOULD KNOW ABOUT SEX xi. It is a God-ordained means of cutting and renewing the covenant of marriage (1Cor 6:15-16, Mat 19:4-6). xii. It is intended to be practised only with your spouse and in the presence of nobody including your children above or around the age of accountability (Pro 5:15-18, Eph 5:15). xiii. God intends it to take mutual agreement between husband and wife without either of the couple being forced (1Cor 7:3-4). Don't force him to have sex with you. Neither frustrate him until he begins to use force or threat on you. Always have mutual agreement and understanding about your sexual life. No matter how different your opinions may be, submit to him as the head. Even if you are not going to have sex with him at a particular time, submit to his authority. You may need to beg him presenting your strong reasons. And not arguing with him that you have made your decision and nobody can change it! Sometimes, you may have to sacrifice the moment and go out of your way to have sex with him whether it is convenient for you or not. You see, five minutes sex with your husband may cause his frustration and depression of days or weeks to disappear! Everything is not prayer or deliverance. Jesus said: "WATCH and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is week" (Mat 26:41). You need to watch how you live with your husband or else your prayers will become ineffective and you will get into unnecessary trouble. Be a good example for other women in the church! xiv. God intends that they should not defraud each other of their conjugal right to sex so that they would not open the door to Satan (1Cor 7:5, 1Cor 7:2, Jn 10:10). It is a sin to punish your spouse with sex. Anyone who knows the right thing to do, but refuses to do it commits a sin (James 4:17). Don't wait until your husband comes begging you for sex before you give him his conjugal rights. Do you wait for your children to beg you for food before you give them food? No, a billion times no. It is just their right. You give them when due. Give your husband sex when due even without his asking for it. Surprise him. Study him. Seduce him. Set him up in your bedroom. Satisfy him until he wants no more for the moment. Church members can bless him with different things but only you are ordained or permitted to give him sex. A giant in the Christendom fell some years ago. He shook the kingdom of darkness. He had conducted powerful crusades in different places with the gifts of healings in operation. But his mistake was that he had a habit of travelling with his a female assistant. They probably lodged in the same hotel but in different rooms I guess. Somehow they became too close until they had sex together once or more. When she became pregnant for him and the secret became known to the minister's wife. She went to report to his spiritual father in the Lord. And when he called this minister he confessed that it was true but his wife caused it because she refused to satisfy him sexually. So he travelled with a female secretary or personal assistant who gave to him sexually what the wife was stingy with (1Cor 7:2-5). That is a great sin in the sight of God! It's better for a man of God to travel with a male assistant. He should never be too close to a female staff member or female church member! Many years has come and gone ever since but the great man of God has never regained his balance and position of esteem or honour in the Body of Christ. No wonder Solomon wrote: "But whoso commiteth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul. A WOUND AND DISHONOUR SHALL HE GET; AND HIS REPROACH SHALL NOT BE WIPED AWAY" (Pro 6:32-33). The KJV says "his shame will never be wiped away" (vs 33). The Amplified Bible puts verse 32 as: " But whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks heart and understanding (moral principle and prudence)..." Every minister and his wife must ensure they have sound moral principles and prudence. Dear Pastor's wife, please surround your one and only husband with faith, hope and love. Know that every time you say no to him for sex without any good scriptural reason, there are some women out there who may be willing to give him 'sweet sex' freely and regularly. Don't push him to those loose women or sex wolves. The Lord told my wife around the time we got married: "Satisfy my son." Paul warned: "Look carefully then how you walk! Live purposefully and worthily and accurately, not as the unwise and witless, but as wise (sensible, intelligent people), Making the very most of the time [buying up each opportunity], because the days are evil. Therefore do not be vague and thoughtless and foolish, but understanding and firmly grasping what the will of the Lord is" (Eph 5:15-17, AMP). Try to understand the sexual level of your husband. Some pastors are sexually hyperactive; they are really hot while some others are sexually hypoactive; they are really cold. Still some others are in between; they are warm, neither hot nor cold. xv. It helps intimacy between husband and wife (1Cor 6:15-17). It brings soul tie. The more they enjoy it in a legitimate marriage, the stronger the legitimate soul tie; but the more they shy away from it, the weaker the soul tie. There is an evil or wrong soul tie through pre-marital or extra-marital sex; and this should be avoided (1Cor 3:16-17, 1Cor 6:17-20, Eccl 10:8). xvi. It should never be spiritualized or seen as something that makes you carnal or less spiritual (Gen 1:27-28). I remember the story of a "holiness" woman whose husband approached for sex, I think after the wedding ceremony. But because she had the wrong impression that sex in marriage is wrong, she refused her husband his rights; rather she started praying that God would deliver her from [sexual] temptation from her husband. She was being over-righteous! Solomon warned, "Do not be over overrighteous, neither be overwise why destroy yourself? Do not be overwicked, and do not be a fool why die before your time? It is good to grasp the one and not let go of the other. The man who fears God will avoid all extremes" (Eccl 7:16-18, NIV). Turning down an invitation to sex from your spouse without a reasonable excuse opens the door to Satan to frustrate your life and marriage. xvii. God intends that it should be neither too little nor too much but to be moderate (1Cor 7:29, 1Cor 6:12, Gal 5:23; [self control], Pro 25:16, 27). Some couples may love it once per week. Some others may want it once in two, three, four, or more weeks. Still some others will like it twice in one week. There is no fixed rule here. Just strike a wise balance that will help, and not hinder both of you spiritually, emotionally and physically. xviii. God intends that both of the couple enjoy it and are satisfied each time they do it (Pro 5:19). If you or your husband cannot perform well sexually, I will suggest that you see your family doctor, perhaps together or see a sound marriage counsellor together or buy one or two good Christian books or CDs on sex. Neither watch blue films nor read pornographic magazines to learn how to perform better in bed. It will open you up to the spirit of lust and of adultery (Mat 5:28, Pro 6:25). Both of you should discuss how to improve your sex life. Talk privately about what brings out the best in both of you sexually. In the past, l was wrongly teaching couples to try different reasonable styles or positions in different unquestionable places with their spouses. But after a dearly wonderful brother referred me to the testimony of Pst Olugbenga Oladejo based in the U.K., I changed my teaching along this line. In 2014, the Lord took this pastor to hell and showed him how perverted sexual practices are taking married Christian couples to hell. God only wants married couples to practise the missionary style on their matrimonial bed with the husband on top of his wife (face-to-face), which is symbolic of a wife submitting to her own husband's authority as the head (Ephesians 5:22-24, Colossians 3:18)! Please I will strongly recommend that every married couple google or youtube Pastor Olugbenga Oladejo's testimony: A Warning for Married Christian Couples. xix. God intends that it should be withheld by mutual agreement of the couple as the need arises (1Cor 7:5, NIV + KJV). Sometimes for spiritual, medical, surgical or vocational reasons, a couple may have to abstain from sex temporarily by mutual consent. xx. God intends that the couple should plan their sexual life wisely to prevent unwanted/mistimed pregnancy, unnecessary pains, etc (Eph 5:15-17). A particular couple did an abortion because of an unwanted pregnancy. So their lives were battered by affliction. Then a man of God saw that blood was the cause of their problem. They had shed innocent blood. Abortion is a sin, even in marriage (Lev 17:11). CHAPTER SEVEN SHE SHOULD BE ALLOWED AND RELEASED TO FUNCTION MAXIMALLY IN THE AREA OF HER GIFT. "Let every man abide in the same calling wherein he was called" (1Cor 7:20). If a pastor's wife is a prophetess, then he shouldn't compel her to be an evangelist. Moving in the gift of prophecy does not make her a prophet. So if she is anointed with the simple gift of prophecy, she should avoid being lured into the office of a prophetess. (For further study on the ministry of a prophet, study volume 3 in our ministry gifts series titled: "The Ministry of a Prophet".) If she is just a teacher, then don't force her to be an apostle. If she is a healing minister, then don't hinder her from fulfilling her ministry. Whatever her calling is, whether to be a singer, drama minister, intercessor or something else, she should do it seriously and effectively under the pastoral cover of her husband. She must learn the secret of submitting to the authority and anointing of a pastor. She must separate the man as her husband from the man as her pastor. So she must submit to her husband's authority as a wife and to her pastor's authority as a sheep in the flock. Very importantly, she must be encouraged and released to fulfil her ministry both within the local church and outside. The great evangelist, Maria Woodward Etter, lost some of her children when she refused to answer God's call on her life. [To discover, understand and fulfil your calling or ministry, you may read my books: "Certificate in Christian Ministry" and "Unfolding the Fivefold Ministry." You may also read: "The Ministry of an Apostle," "The Ministry of a Prophet," "The Ministry of an Evangelist," "The Ministry of a Pastor" and "The Ministry of a Teacher." ] CHAPTER EIGHT BE A LEADER OR SUPPORTER OF THE WOMEN'S GROUP SHE SHOULD BE THE LEAD OR SUPPORTING COORDINATOR OR JUST STRONG SUPPORTER OF THE WOMEN'S GROUP WITHIN THE CHURCH DEPENDING ON HER GOD-GIVEN GRACE OR ABILITY. Not all pastors' wives can take the leading position in the church women's group. Some can, but others will have to assume a supportive role. The master gave the 3 servants talents according to their ability (Matthew 25:15). She should avoid being in every committee or event that comes up unless she must be involved. CHAPTER NINE GET THE WOMEN TRAINED DIRECTLY OR INDIRECTLY WITH THE HELP OF CAPABLE PEOPLE, SHE SHOULD SEE TO HOW THEY CAN TRAIN ALL THE WOMEN TO BE THEIR BEST IN THEIR MARRIAGE, FINANCES, CHRISTIAN SERVICE, AND SO ON. Seminars can be organized on many vital issues relating to women in connection to their husbands, children, ministries, businesses, health, and so on. But it should be done by seeking God's face for direction. Capable ministers or speakers can be invited as the Spirit leads. All these things should be planned wisely and executed carefully under the close supervision of the pastor. She should not use this group to cause division in the church or to control the leadership of the church. Paul warned: "But be sure that everything is done properly and in order" (1Cor 14:40, NLT). CHAPTER TEN ATTRACT PEOPLE TO CHRIST, DON'T REPEL THEM SHE SHOULD REALIZE THAT WHATEVER SHE OR HER HUSBAND (THE PASTOR) SAYS OR DOES, OR REFUSES TO SAY OR DO HAS THE GREATEST INFLUENCE TO ATTRACT, RETAIN OR REPEL PEOPLE FROM THE CHURCH. Leadership is influence. Good or bad. That means good leadership produces good influence whereas bad leadership releases bad influence. A leader who has no influence is not a true leader. An African proverb says: "If you are leading, and nobody is following you; you are not a leader but just on a stroll !" How many pastors' wives have caused churches to fold up through bad influence? How many pastors' wives have caused churches to grow up through good influence? (Please read Matthew 20:25-28). SINNERS CONFESSION If you are not yet born-again, say this: I choose to repent today. Also I choose to believe that Jesus died for my sins and rose up for my justification. The Scripture says, If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved (Rom 10:9). Therefore, I believe in Jesus in my heart and confess Him as my Lord. Now I am born-again (Amen). SAY THIS ALOUD TO RECEIVE THE HOLY SPIRIT Also Jesus said, But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you and you will be my witnesses (Acts 1:8). And on the day of Pentecost All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance (Acts 2:4). Therefore, I receive the Holy Spirit by faith right now and I begin to speak in an unknown tongue (unlearned tongue) as He gives me the utterance. I command every foul spirit [spirit of fear, spirit of unbelief, spirit of doubt, religious spirit, unforgiving spirit] wanting to hinder me to stop in its evil operation in my life in Jesus name. Thank you God for filling me with your Spirit in Jesus name (Amen). Books By The Same Author How to Interpret Dreams and Visions Why Marriages Break How to Find the Right Life Partner Secrets of Financial and Material Prosperity How to Receive Your Divine Healing Unfolding the Fivefold Ministry The Ministry of an Apostle The Ministry of a Prophet The Ministry of an Evangelist The Ministry of a Pastor The Ministry of a Teacher Passion for the Lost Understanding the Call of God Basic Bible Course How to Receive the Holy Spirit Fulfilling Your Divine Destiny Day of Reckoning: God's Formula for Eternal Rewards Identifying Counterfeit Ministries Sanctification: Changing from Inside Out O Suffering, Why Really Me? Intimacy with God The Pastor's Wife Why Some Churches Won't Grow! Just Before You Start a Church How to Prepare and Deliver Sermons Finding Your Own Ministry False Doctrines Exposed! How to Raise Money for Ministry Certificate in Christian Ministry 10 Things You Should Know about Healing Why Some Are Not Healed Healing of Crushed Emotions and Disturbed Minds Preconditions for Heaven Volume 1 (What Does the Bible Say about Jewellery, Hairstyle, Body design & Clothings?) Preconditions for Heaven Volume 2 (What Does the Bible Say about Restitution, Tithes and Offering, Sex, Unforgiveness, Gossip, False Christianity and so on?) SPECIAL! SPECIAL! SPECIAL! A MUST READING/VIEW (Google the following free of charge on the Internet and God will change your life forever.) 1. Holiness Required For Heaven by Carillo from Bolivia 2. Eternal Destinations: Godly Attire and Adornment 3. Another Warning by Kingsley Ubani 4. Time Is Over : Run For Your Life by Kingsley Ubani 5. 9 Testimonies on Tithing from Heaven and Hell Visions 6. The Dangers of Eating Gods Tithes and Offerings 7. The Visitation of Jesus to Samuel Oghenetega (Crosscheck these testimonies with the Scriptures and if you have questions you may send us an email.) About the Author Segun Olumide and his wife, Tosin are founding ministers in the New Apostolic Movement and the Glorious Family Church International both in Lagos, Nigeria. He has a divine mandate to align the Church with God's purpose. In a vision, the Lord showed him a Bible opened to the Acts of the Apostles with the words APOSTOLIC CALL on one of the pages. They reach out through School Of Ministry, School of Life (Pre-Bible School), NAM Bible School and NAM Correspondence Bible School and Healing School. His apostolic teachings have blessed the Body of Christ across the nation. Connect with me online If God has blessed you through this book, please send me an e-mail to share your testimony, inspiration or reading experience, mail to: [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/olumide.olusegun.5 NAM PARTNERS (NEW APOSTOLIC MOVEMENT PARTNERS) Abundance of peace be multiplied to you in Jesus' name. If God has blessed you through this ministry, I want you to prayerfully consider becoming a financial and prayer partner with us in discipling the nations for Christ before he comes back. Surely you will reap the reward on earth and also in eternity, as you follow Jesus to the end. You may support us in prayer daily. Also you may support us financially with any amount of money God lays upon your heart just once, monthly, every 3 months, every 6 months or yearly as it is convenient for you. You may contact us by email: [email protected] or call: +234-816-1297-781. God bless you real good. All rights reserved. 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