I was feeling a little down because it seemed my relationship with God had become sort of…distant, in comparison to what it has been. I couldn’t put my finger on how or why; but I knew it wasn’t God’s fault, it was mine.

I had been reminded of the benefits of journaling several times recently. I used to do it but didn’t really consider it journaling. It could be more accurately described as complaining, venting, and wondering why the awful things in my life didn’t end. And it was sporadic, not daily, except for the season of an awfully long, dark, ugly valley.

I felt like God was prodding me to read those old journal entries, but that was something I found quite easy to put off doing, with only a slightly guilty conscience. In my mind I reasoned that now that I am out of that miserable valley, I really do not want to be reminded of it.

Then recently I was praying with someone who was praying Psalm 40:1-3: ^“I waited patiently for Adonai, till he turned toward me and heard my cry. He brought me up from the roaring pit, up from the muddy ooze, and set my feet on a rock, making my footing firm.” (CJB)

I “heard” God beckoning me to draw nearer to Him again, beginning with reading my old journal entries. It didn’t turn out to be unpleasant reminders of the worst time in my life, as I had expected. Rather, it was a warm comforting time and most of all, encouraging. I knew I had read a lot from the book of Psalms during that season in the dark valley, but reading again those portions of the various psalms, effected my drawing near to God again (James 4:8).

As I meandered through the Psalms, I was led to Psalm 91, and paused to meditate.

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
Will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. (NASB)

From that first verse to the very last, this psalm is filled with promises…but there is a catch. The promises of Psalm 91 are for those who dwell in God’s shelter, or “secret place” as it says in the KJV.

Dwelling in God’s secret place is not the same as being a good church member or being able to quote hundreds of Bible verses from memory or running a big well-known evangelistic ministry. It is, however, the same as John quotes Jesus as saying in John 15:4-5.

Our spiritual health suffers if we drift out from the secret place of God. You see, God created us “to declare the praises of the One who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light.” 1 Peter 2:9 (CJB) I cannot fulfill that calling if I allow myself to slip out of His Presence. Anywhere besides in God’s secret place means we are in less than optimum spiritual health.

When I was thinking about my drifting away from the closer relationship with God I had enjoyed at one time, I kept hearing the same words God told Moses in Exodus 24, “Come up to me on the mountain and stay there.” Meditating on that along with Psalm 91 rendered a lovely peaceful conclusion.

When God told Moses to come up the mountain and stay with Him, He was summoning Moses to His secret place, His shelter. So, when Moses wrote Psalm 91 bidding us do the same, he knew what he was talking about. And later, Jesus Himself explains how we as branches, need to abide in the vine.

Now, my mind is prone to taking off, wandering without my consent. Eventually, I catch up and bring it back to the matter at hand, but writing down my thoughts, complaints, pleasures, joys, thankfulness for answered prayer – it all helps me stay focused on God and stay in His Presence, in the shelter of the Most High.

I was raised in church but always felt like I was missing something. Now the Word of God excites me! My curiosity enhances the pursuance of discernment. I have often felt discouraged, but not totally defeated knowing that in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us.