Word Count: 1059

Contact Shannon Heiden

That's Just The Way It Is......

by Shannon Heiden  
7/19/2009 / Devotionals

Two are better than one. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! (Ecclesiastes 4:10 NIV)

Beautiful One, did you know that we were created for relationship? Relationships are designed to bring fulfillment, love, nurturing and strength to our lives. No matter what type of relationship we have experienced, with all of the conflict, joys and sorrows that accompany them, who can deny that being connected to another who adds love, encouragement and support to our life is one of the most desirable and fulfilling things we could ever experience?

Sometimes our relationships are strong and thriving. And then, sometimes they are weak and unhealthy. Because of events, circumstances, character issues and how well the people in the relationships are doing in their own personal life, are determining factors as to whether or not that particular relationship will grow and endure or wither and die.

Somehow we compare ourselves to the next person and think that our relationships should mirror that which we find desirable. But the truth is, what works for me might not work for you. We are unique. Created as individuals, with different likes and desires. We love who we love and the heart knows no different.

But what happens, when a relationship has wounded you and left a gaping hole in your heart? Generally, these wounds aren't inflicted by strangers.True anyone can wound us, but I am talking about those closest to you.

Those that cheer for you in the stands as you run your race. You know if you have had this, you know how good it feels to have a captive audience encouraging you along your way.

You might also know what it is to not have had this. Maybe your audience has held you captive, for years even. Maybe the ones who were supposed to have protected and loved you, were the very ones who walked off and left you.

Depositing the gift of abandonment within you, you now approach every relationship through the lens of pain, mistrust and ultimately because you weren't shown your worth, you don't believe you have any and therefore you wont receive it.

I recently got the news that my biological dad had died this past June. He was in prison serving time for attempted murder of his then 83 year old mother, my grandmother. His crime was shocking and horrible. Up until the year 2004, I never knew him. I was one year old when my parents divorced and my dad chose to walk away from it all. He actually had a birth certificate burning party to burn up any memory of me so that he could start anew with someone else.

Meeting my dad in a prison pretty much shattered all the dreams I had of him.. All the questions I carried there, were still there when I left. Actually a few more were added. You see, I always saw other girls with their dads, hearing them being called "daddy's girl" and my heart always hurt.

I had deeply longed and desired such a relationship, so much so that I had romanticized what my life would be like thinking that someday it would all be made up to me. I longed more for the one who walked away, and overlooked the ones who actually stayed.

Beautiful One, sometimes we can get caught up with the ones who have rejected us and in doing so, we push the hand away that is reaching for us. When I heard the news of my dad passing, not one tear was shed, there was no relationship that held us together. I knew when I met him that God didn't bring me there for a relationship, but for closure. God wanted me to know that daddy wasn't coming for his girl, not this dad and not for this girl.

There are people who come into our lives and they are just passing through. We think it should be a certain way, because it works for others, but this is not always the case.

Then there are those who come into our lives and they stick. They are committed and connected and nothing shall separate them.

All my life all I wanted was to know my dad. When I finally met him, all I wanted to do was to just get away from him. I thought God was holding out on me all those years, when all the while God was sparing me while I was unaware.

Beautiful One, Jesus said "your enemies will be that of your own household." Jesus knew that wherever people are, things gets messy. Whether your related or not.

Sometimes we have to let go. Other times we must endure. Relationships require all parties involved to be active in maintaining it.

I didn't have a say when my dad walked away and erased me from his life. My voice was silenced. But now, my voice is silent no more.

The truth is; our God is a miracle working God, and sometimes we don't see the miracle in the mire. My dad walked out and left a gaping hole that took me years to overcome- that's just the way it is. But God gave me a mother who remained committed and connected. God also gave me a father who loved and provided for us the best he could.

Beautiful One, our greatest tragedy is not what happened to us, our greatest tragedy will be if we don't arise, embrace the truth of what is, and take the power we have been given to turn it around into what we want it to be.

The choice is ours..

I never thought in a million years that I'd be saying "thank you" to the ones who have wounded me. What they meant for evil, my God has turned for good and I am who I am because of my adversities.

I choose to leave this world differently than I came, with no one to lean on, rely on or blame. I chose this day to be the change I want to see.

How about you, are you in this thing to win it, or will others dictate the course of your life?

Beautiful one, just believe because that's just the way it is......

Shannon Heiden
[email protected]
changingonelifereachingmany.typepad.com

Article Source: http://www.faithwriters.com-CHRISTIAN WRITERS

If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! Click here and TRUST JESUS NOW

Read more articles by Shannon Heiden

Like reading Christian Articles? Check out some more options. Read articles in Main Site Articles, Most Read Articles or our highly acclaimed Challenge Articles. Read Great New Release Christian Books for FREE in our Free Reads for Reviews Program. Or enter a keyword for a topic in the search box to search our articles.

Enter comments below. Due to spam, all hyperlinks posted in the comments are now immediately disabled by our system.

Please type the following word below:

Not readable? Change text.

The opinions expressed by authors do not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.

Hire a Christian Writer, Christian Writer Wanted, Christian Writer Needed, Christian Content Needed, Find a Christian Editor, Hire a Christian Editor, Christian Editor, Find a Christian Writer