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Messy People in a Messy World

by James Barringer  
10/08/2009 / Christian Living

Earlier this morning, I spent a few hours mowing lawns to help my friend Seth with his lawn care business. It's a great job for me because it doesn't demand all of my attention, which leaves my mind free to wander - which in turn gives me plenty of time to come up with notes like this one to drop on my unsuspecting Facebook and Myspace friends.

Specifically, Seth and I were taking care of a Bank of America in Arlington. This one was more important than most because a lot of the people from corporate come by, and it's always a good idea to impress the people who determine whether you stay employed. Because of that, Seth told me to take care of picking up the trash - "No piece of trash is too small," he advised.

Half an hour into the process, while daydreaming about something else entirely, it occurred to me just how messy the parking lot really was. Scattered with cigarette butts, bank receipts, lollipop wrappers, and God only knows what else, it looked like the aftermath of a tornado strike on a trailer park (with slightly fewer mounted deer heads). Weeks of abuse and neglect demonstrated just how little people cared about the parking lot - and over time, its state came to reflect that.

Then along came one person who cared enough to invest a little time and effort into cleaning stuff up, and two hours later, the grounds looked an awful lot nicer.

It occurred to me as I was picking up my 741st cigarette butt that people's lives often resemble that parking lot. Whether through intentional abuse or simple neglect, our lives pick up a bunch of trash. I believe a lot of things about myself that simply aren't true. I doubt my knowledge, abilities, and character on a near-daily basis. Let me give an example that I will run with for the rest of this note. I know one girl (and would probably know a lot more, if the topic ever came up) who is stunningly beautiful but simply can't believe that she's attractive. Somewhere along the line, someone told her something horrible, or perhaps merely failed to affirm her beauty, and her life picked up trash.

Then I stumbled onto the scene, with nothing more than the desire to help and the willingness to invest a little time and energy. I told her that she was beautiful and worthwhile. I complimented her appearance and told her how much I valued her. Bit by bit, I tried to undo what life had done to her. I don't know whether she's any closer to believing the truth about herself, whether I've made any sort of lasting difference, or anything. But once I saw the trash she was carrying around, I made it my mission to go pick it up.

Everybody has trash. Call it issues, call it baggage; the name's not important. Anybody who thinks they're fully healed from everything just hasn't dug deep enough yet. That goes for you, and it also goes for everybody you know. The cool thing is, the best way to pick up the trash is simply to care. All that parking lot really needed was one person who cared enough to undo what all the other people had done to it.

Often times, though, the hardest part is finding the trash. Unlike my parking lot, where all the cigarette butts were on full display for the world to see, people like to hide their trash. I hinted at this earlier when I mentioned that I only know for sure of one girl who has self-image problems, but I would bet everything I own that she's not the only one of my friends who does. The problem is that trash is messy, and people don't enjoy the thought that there's something wrong with them. That doesn't make your task as a garbage man or garbage woman impossible; it just means you have to be intentional about it.

So just ask yourself, before you get done reading this. How much would you appreciate it if someone was willing to come into your life and clean up your trash? If they were willing to invest the time and energy in you to find out the lies you're believing and the doubts you're grappling with - and then to help you come to believe that those things aren't true? Wouldn't that make you feel special and valued? Now, how fulfilling would it be if you could be that person in someone else's life?

All I'm really saying is to think about how easy it is to really make a difference to someone. All it takes is a little (okay, a lot of) time and the eagerness to care. Try keeping your eyes open for the opportunity. As for me, I'll keep working on that girl, and I'll keep picking up her trash every chance I get. May she be the first of many.

Jim Barringer is a 38-year-old writer, musician, and teacher. More of his work can be found at facebook.com/jmbarringer. This work may be reprinted for any purpose so long as this bio and statement of copyright is included.

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