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PMS- Shouldn't Stress You out

by Dawn Lucy  
7/19/2011 / Dating

P.M. S- Does it stress you out?
When I write P.M.S., I am not talking about Pre-menstrual syndrome, but rather Premarital Sex. We live in a culture that advocates pre-marital sex today not just for single adults whether divorced or widowed but for teens as well. When I was a teenager in the 80s, the age of AIDS awareness began and many people feared pre-marital sex but often did not take the necessary precautions. We had to become a culture that needed to be smart and have safe sex through the use of condoms. Abstinence was rarely mentioned as an option. However, the advice I was given by a couple who used to keep me during my elementary school years after school, encouraged me to remain a virgin until I married. In fact, they told me to beware of guys who told me that they loved me because this was often a ploy to get one into bed. As a teen, I was extremely conscientious about remaining pure in my dating relationships and often went on couple dates. However, as I began college, I was away from home and by my sophomore year, I became serious about the young man I was dating. I had gone with this young man to his fraternity formal, it was there he told me he loved me, and the conditions were right for us to engage in sex. The formal was in a hotel, and we had a hotel room for an overnight stay. Immediately, I had a flash back to what my mentors had told me about the ploys of young men. I did not have sex with him that night, because of what my mentors had said to me in the past. I could see it clearly. It is still true today that we must be smart and wise in how we date. Teens of today need to focus on real and genuine relationships. My advice for today's teen as well as college and career young people is to get to know who you are dating. Make sure you have common interests, likes and dislikes. Focus on getting to know the other person and who they are as a person. When people engage in pre-marital sex they may bond intimately however, they may not really be right for one another because they often have not taken time to get to know the real person. Commitment is a thing of the past for many people. Often young people go from broken relationship to broken because all they focused on was the sexual intimacy and not real intimacy of being equally yoked with religion, interests and hobbies. Television programming and the movies of today glorify pre-marital sex relationships but in actuality people who go from relationship to relationship having pre-marital sex have a lot of mixed up emotions and baggage going into future relationships. It makes it difficult to recognize the person you are trying to have a soul connection and true intimacy for long term. It is easier to recognize what you want and not want when you clearly see who a person is less the pre-marital sex. It makes for easier break-ups and the relationship often stays intact much better so that people can remain friends instead of ex-lovers and dating enemies. One remains healthier emotionally not to mention physically. You do not open yourself up to potential pregnancies outside of marriage or STDs. Pre-marital sex does not have to stress your relationships if you choose to abstain and wait until you meet the right one. In "What Women Want" Mel Gibson's daughter said she knows she should wait to have sex until she loves someone. True love waits and waits until the marriage day. It also makes for a much healthier start to marriage.

Former business professional- turned frelance writer. I have a passion for writing children stories and articles on teen/ single daiting advice.

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