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Remote Control Disease
by Melissa Martin
11/10/2011 / Humor
Women with channel-surfing husbands, this news flash is for you (and pay special attention if your husband is retired). A man, a television, and a remote control are a dangerous combination. Ask yourself these questions. Does he fall asleep with the remote control in his hand? When you try to slowly slide the remote from his fingers, does he wake up and pretend he wasn't sleeping? Does he deny he has a remote control addiction? Does he race you to the television each evening and dive for the remote? Does he carry the remote to the kitchen between commercials when he makes a snack? Does he stare mesmerized and oblivious to his environment? Does he think there will be television in heaven? Wives, if you answered "yes" to these questions, then take note. Your husband has the dreaded disorder of "T.V.-Remote Control Disease". There is no known cure and the disease usually progresses. I tried hiding the remote once, but hubby only became grouchy and irritable. Yelling and threatening does not cure this disorder! This is WAR, "Women Against Remotes." I believe the government needs to allocate funds to study the effects of this disorder on the family and society. This disease appears to be genetically inherited, but only effects the males of the family. I will continue to search for the cure and will immediately let the world know when I discover it.
Melissa writes about the God and human connection and condition.
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