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Young lady decides on dual career as surgeon/comedienne

by Greg Miller
5/08/2012 / Humor

For years, Alyssa wanted to work as a surgeon.

Alyssa discussed her dream with her minister, Pastor Addison. Why do you want to become a surgeon?," asked the pastor.

"I love the thought of helping people," Alyssa responded. "And as a surgeon, I will be able to be God's hands extended on the earth."

During medical school, Alyssa worked part time as a secretary. She realized she was gaining valuable experience in dealing with people. "These skills will come in handy after I become a surgeon," Alyssa said.

Alyssa had a great sense of humor. Her best friend, Allison, suggested she try her hand as a stand-up comic. "There's a new Christian comedy club in town, Allison said. "Why don't you call them and ask about auditioning to perform?"

Alyssa called the comedy club the following day. Two days later, she met with Adrianna, the club's manager, for an audition.

Since there was no audience with whom Alyssa could interact, she pretended Adrianna was a volunteer from an audience.

Adrianna was thrilled with Alyssa's practice performance. "If you're interested, I have a spot open for a performer this Friday night," Adrianna said.

"If we can come to an agreement on remuneration, I'm definitely interested," Alyssa said. "What's the usual pay for a first-time performer?"

"First-time performers usually receive 50 bucks, plus a free dinner," said Adrianna.

"If you can add one more dinner for my boyfriend, Andrew, we've got a deal," said Alyssa.

"Great!," Adrianna exclaimed. "I'll make the arrangements. The club opens at 5 p.m. for those who come early for dinner. The comedy show starts at 7 p.m. That will give you plenty of time to eat before you perform.

"You'll be the number two performer. If you do well, I'd like to have you as one of our regular performers. You'll be able to exercise your gift of comedy every Friday evening."

"You're very kind to give a newcomer like me such a wonderful opportunity," said Alyssa.

"I can tell your number-one goal with your comedy is to exalt the Lord Jesus Christ," said Adrianna. "And that's the goal of our club."

"Have you ever thought about working as a professional comedienne?," asked Alyssa.

"No," chuckled Adrianna. "I'm very content managing the club."

"I have a question for you, too," said Adrianna. "Would you ever consider becoming a full-time professional stand-up comedienne?"

"Not a chance," said Alyssa. "But I do think I am going to pursue a dual career as a surgeon/comedienne. I do think my ability to make people laugh shows I'm somewhat of a cutup. And I also believe that I'll have a pretty enjoyable time using my talents as a surgeon. God has been good enough to share both talents with me, and I don't want to waste either one of them!"

To contact the writer of this column about speaking engagements and/or puppet ministry, please email [email protected].

By Greg Miller 2018

Greg is retired from the Elizabethton STAR Newspaper, after working there for almost 23 years. He now freelances for the paper. Contact email address is [email protected], also facebook.com/kidcool4jesus. Available for speaking engagements/other ministries. Jesus is Lord

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