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God Kicks Lucifer Out of Heaven

by Greg Miller  
7/23/2012 / Humor


2012

Lucifer was the most beautiful of all the angels created by the Sovereign Lord.


God had created Lucifer to serve as heaven's worship leader, in charge of all the angelic host's worship of God. Every time he looked into the mirror of his inner self, he aspired to greater heights. Lucifer was not content with his role. "I want to be the boss of this outfit," he complained to himself.


"I'm so handsome and adorable," Lucifer bragged. "I know I could do a much better job of being God than the guy who's currently on the throne.


So Lucifer weighed his choices. He opted for a full-blown rebellion against the Creator of the Universe. He began talking to the other angels and persuaded one third of them to join his cause, which was doomed to failure before it began.


"You know I created you to worship and serve me!," the voice of the Sovereign Lord thundered throughout the universe. "And you still dared to rebel against me!"


"Yes, Sir, I did," Lucifer admitted. "Your throne looked so majestic and beautiful, I began to think how wonderful it would be for me to sit there and make some decisions myself."


"I'm omnipotent!," declared the Lord. "That means I'm all-powerful. I'm omniscient. That means I know everything."


God removed Lucifer's heavenly citizenship and kicked the disobedient creature toward the earth. "I wonder where I'm going to land," Lucifer thought.


Moments later, Lucifer landed in the Paradise of the Garden of Eden. "Wow!," he exclaimed. "This is nice. It's not heaven, of course, but it's not bad. Not bad at all."


I wonder what creatures God created this place for," said Lucifer.


Lucifer noticed another creature about 100 yards to his right. Then Lucifer heard voices. "It's the cool of the day," said Adam to Eve, his wife. "It's time to keep our daily appointment with our heavenly father."


"I really look forward to these conversations with Him," Eve replied.


Hand in hand, Adam and Eve walked down the well-worn path on which the couple walked to meet with God. Upon their arrival at the designated spot, they bowed themselves in adoration and worship of the Lord, who was already there.


"I've been waiting for you," said the Lord.

"I have a question for you," said Adam. "You haven't created any new animals for me to name, have you?"


"No," replied the Lord.


"I'm asking because on the way here I sensed a strange presence in the Garden," said Adam.


"I wouldn't necessarily call it an evil presencemaybe appealing," said Eve.


"Watch out for that presence," warned the Lord. "If you don't, you may discover that it is, indeed, very evil after all!"


To contact the writer of this column about speaking engagements, including Christian Comedy Fundraisers and puppet ministry, please email [email protected].

By Greg Miller 2018

Greg is retired from the Elizabethton STAR Newspaper, after working there for almost 23 years. He now freelances for the paper. Contact email address is [email protected], also facebook.com/kidcool4jesus. Available for speaking engagements/other ministries. Jesus is Lord

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