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Dealing with betrayal by church leaders

by Marie Grossett  
10/01/2012 / Self Help

Your pastor and their spouse are suppose to be the people you can turn too in times of discomfort, people that you can share your secrets too. But what do you do when that trust gets broken?

Normally it is the members of the church that gossips about the pastor, but what do you do if it's the other way round?

This is something I had to unfortunately deal with recently. My husband and I found out by another member of the congregation that our Pastor and his wife had been telling them our personal business. They had spoken hurtful things about us and when we confronted them about this all they did was apologise and said that some of the things we've heard was taken out of content.

Taken out of content or not the point is they betrayed us. People that we supported in their ministry and we looked up too as leaders gossiped about us. We decided to take this further and speak to the bishop about this but nothing was done, so not only was we betrayed by our Pastor we felt let down by the whole organisation.

Some of you reading this has been or is going through the same situation as me. So what do you do? Do you let go of your Christianity, and stop going to church all together? Do you take revenge on the leaders? No instead you forgive.

I came to realise that despite this situation my Christianity is based on my relationship with God, I love God and whether I stay in this church or not I'm still going to serve him.
My family and I currently go to another church, but I can honestly say that I forgive the Pastor and his wife; I have no hatred towards them and wish them well in all they do. However in terms of trust that has been severely damaged and for now it would be difficult for us to stay underneath their leadership, healing does take time.

If you are going through this circumstance my advice to you is don't give up on God, don't allow this situation to deter you from your faith. Just continue to stay close to him and allow him to deal with your hurt. Don't give up on going to church either the Bible says we must not 'give up meeting together', it is important to fellowship with other Christians, whether you continue to go to the same church or not just don't be an 'island'.

Forgive your Pastor and wife, not forgiving will only make you bitter and resentful, finally don't contact members of the church just to have a gossip about what is going on in the church, it's not about scoring points it's about you and God.

Remember the lord can take a negative situation and turn it into positive, so just trust and acknowledge him and he will direct your path.

Marie Grossett aka Vanessa Grossett is a published Author, and has interviewed best selling and award winning Christian Authors.

She is a Literary Agent at The Authors Care Services ltd. www.theauthorscare.co.uk [email protected]

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