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Deer Plan Unusual Christmas Celebration

by Greg Miller  
12/09/2012 / Holidays


 
By Greg Miller
 
Two deer, Buck and his mate, Doe, were grateful they had survived another Thanksgiving hunting season.
 
"God is so good to us every day," said Doe.
 
"You've got that right," Buck replied.
 
Doe and Buck had become accustomed to some of the holiday observances of their human neighbors. The deer, however, did not fully understand some of those customs.
 
"For one thing, the concept of celebrating birthdays every year is a little strange," said Buck. "They place candles on cakes, set them on fire, blow out the fire, then give all kinds of gifts to the one who is celebrating the birthday."
 
"Yeah, that's really weird," Doe agreed. "Something else that is unusual to me is the big meals these humans insist on eating at Thanksgiving and Christmas. They prepare a big turkey or ham and lots of cooked vegetables and baked desserts.
 
"I don't understand why they can't be satisfied with a couple of plates of grass. To be honest, I don't know why they even have to have plates!"
 
"Well, remember, Dear, they are humans, and not deer," Buck replied. "So we can't expect them to be normal."
 
"That's true," Doe acknowleged. "Sometimes, though, it's hard for me to understand them."
 
"I have an idea," Buck smiled.
 
Doe recognized the familiar look on her mate's face. "You're up to something, aren't you?," she asked, returning the smile.
 
An excited Buck explained his idea to Doe. "Let's invite them to eat Christmas dinner with us," he said. "We'll prepare a delectable salad of fresh cut grass and tree leaves. It will be a feast fit for a royal deer family."
 
"Do you really think they will agree to it?," asked Doe. "You know, they are just as used to their customs as we are to ours."
 
"You're right," Buck said. "But if the plan doesn't work, we can always go with plan B."
 
"What's Plan B?," asked Doe.
 
The sly smile returned to Buck's face. "If they don't accept our invitation to eat Christmas dinner with us, we will accept their invitation to share their Christmas feast. I've always wondered what turkey-and-dressing and mashed potatoes taste like!"
 
"Oh, Dear!," exclaimed Doe.
 
 
Suddenly, a puzzled look appeared on Doe's face. "If they do accept our invitation, how are we going to cut the grass and tree leaves?," she asked. "We don't even have any human tools with which to cut them."
 
Buck didn't even have to think about his answer. "I've thought of everything," he said. "We'll just use our teeth, of course. I know they will really love the fact that we used such a personal touch!"
 
To contact the writer of this column about speaking engagements, including Christian Comedy Fundraisers (christiancomedyfundraisers.yolasite.com) and/or puppet ministry, please email [email protected].

By Greg Miller 2018

Greg is retired from the Elizabethton STAR Newspaper, after working there for almost 23 years. He now freelances for the paper. Contact email address is [email protected], also facebook.com/kidcool4jesus. Available for speaking engagements/other ministries. Jesus is Lord

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