"The walls we build around us to keep out the sadness also keeps out the joy"-Jim Rohn
Heartbreak after heartbreak we go through this trial and error thing in relationships. How many times must we meet Mr. Not-Quite-Where-He-Needs-To-Be-Yet or Mr. Immature-And-Not-Quite-Ready-To-Settle-Down? It is quite difficult to open up yourself to people when you know what it feels like to be hurt. The best defense mechanism in this dating scene is to hold back and not expect too much. When we finally make the decision to try one more time with the next person, we go into it grudgingly. After all, if you don't expect too much, you won't be hurt or disappointed.
We often think that this nonchalant, "keep them at bay" attitude is our little secret. On the contrary, people read body language. We know when someone isn't putting forth 100%. It's the same with matters of the heart. They say that for every action there is a reaction. When people sense that there is something not quite right with the other person in a relationship, it causes them to hesitate, speculate, and ultimately causes the relationship to dissipate.
Another relationship buster is holding the new candidate to ridiculous standards. We decide that this time we aren't accepting anything short of perfection. The only problem that we have is that there is no perfect person. There is just the person with the flaws that you will lovingly tolerate. If we're not careful, we wake up one day and the chip that has been on our shoulder all this time has now turned into a boulder.
Let go of old baggage ladies!!! There are not that many eligible men out there so we can't afford to scare them away with the sins of our past men.
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Shakera Reid was born in Kingston, Jamaica and raised in Miramar, Florida. Her passion in life is counseling and educating youth. Hobbies include traveling, writing and watching movies. Her hope is to encourage others through her writing and to help them in their Christian walk.