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Hope & Healing: When Your Spouse Dies
by Theresa Vogel Millward
3/13/2015 / Death
It happened within 24 hours, my husband, Michael, collapsed and died of a heart attack. He had some medical problems, but we didn't know they were life-threatening. The hospital did numerous tests and found out he had an infection that spread to his vital organs. By the time he became critical, it was too late for the doctors to reverse what was happening to my husband. We were married almost 27 years.
A few years later, I took another chance on love, and remarried. My new husband, Nigel, previously had cancer, but a few months into our marriage, his cancer reoccurred and he passed away within one year. To say the least, I was heartbroken.
What do you do when your spouse dies? Whether it is suddenly or gradually, death of a spouse can leave you shocked, devastated, and lost.
I want to share with you what helped me get through my grief and loss the first year, and beyond. It was not easy, but I took one day at a time.
◾My Faith in God: He gave me the strength and courage to go through the grieving process. I depend on him every day of my life. Having faith is a mainstay that can get you through anything. Jesus is my life, my joy, my all.
◾My Friends and Family: I moved back to my hometown where, nearby, live my family and close friends. They are a great support. Making new friends is helpful, too.
◾My Dog: Having a pet is a comfort and a companion. It was good for me to care for her and to be needed. I never had children, so my dog is my "fur baby." I highly recommend a pet, especially for those without children to care for, when you go through a loss. Caring for some thing else, in addition to yourself, helps keep the day busy and fills the void of loneliness.
◾Grief Support Group: If you are comfortable with sharing your loss with others, this can be a helpful way in dealing with your grief. A support group can give you steps on how to move forward in your life. I found a support group beneficial, because it's sharing and caring for each other.
Here is an article, http://www.nextavenue.org/article/2011-03/moving-beyond-grief-after-losing-spouse with more encouraging information on dealing with death of a spouse.
I discovered a video on YouTube, Uncoupled, Dealing With the Death of A Spouse, where four people tell their experiences with loss and what helped them get through their grief. I hope you find it helpful.
There are no cookie cutter solutions for grief and loss, but there is hope, help, and healing.
Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13
Copyright March, 2015. Theresa Vogel Millward, All Rights Reserved.
Author of Along Life's Path: Inspirational Poems, Songs, and Stories. Writes bi-weekly, faith-based blog posts at www.alonglifespath.com. To "encourage your heart and strengthen your faith."
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