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Saved But Full of Evil

by Jerry Ousley  
6/03/2016 / Christian Living


I had done it! I arose from the altar knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that I had been saved! I had come to the Lord, Jesus finally at last! Oh, I was raised in church and I had been taught the ways of the Lord and about the Bible and I had spent a lot of time at the altar as a boy, but somehow it never really sank in until that night. I vowed to never turn back on God and I meant it with all my heart. From that day hence I have continued in salvation.

But then something strange happened. As I walked back to my seat feeling really good about my decision and experiencing a sensation in my body like I had taken a shower in holy water, suddenly I felt something else in there. I found myself looking at another person who had also responded to the altar call that evening. They too had been saved but it didn't look as if they had wept as hard as I had. It didn't appear that they had prayed as earnestly as I had and even though I knew at that moment that God had changed me, still I was proud in the decision I had made and felt that I had experienced it in a greater depth than this other person.

"Wow," I said to myself, "Man you're not even back to your seat yet and you are having sinful thoughts already. Maybe this other person received it and I really didn't." The battle had begun before I could even sit down in my seat. What was this all about? I thought getting saved was supposed to cleanse me of all sin, yet right here I was sinning! I didn't want to, although there must have been some kind of competitive pride going on inside of me. Perhaps I didn't get the full dose and needed to turn around and go back to the altar; but by then I was nearly at my seat so I decided against it.

Over the next few months I found myself doing other things that were wrong. I knew they were wrong and in my heart I wanted to please God more than anything else but there were times I just couldn't seem to resist the temptation and then there I was, feeling like my experience had all been in vain. What was wrong with me? Did other people have the same things happening to them?

Then I discovered that I wasn't the only one. In fact the great Apostle, Paul had felt this way too. I read it for myself in Romans 7:15-25 which says, "For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good. But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find. For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin." I know that's a lot to take in but it described what I was feeling to a "T." I was afraid to tell another Christian about what was going on inside of me because I didn't feel like they'd understand and would perhaps even tell me that I wasn't really a Christian. But right here on the pages of my Bible was one of the strongest believer's I had ever read about who felt just like I did.

Needless to say, it was a freedom I had never felt before. Let me explain; it wasn't telling me that it was okay and that I should just let the body do whatever it pleased. It was my responsibility as recorded elsewhere, even in the writings of this same great Apostle, that I should be doing all that I could to beat sin down and take control of it. But it didn't mean that my failure nullified my salvation.

There's a secret I want to share with you (but we'll talk more about in part 2), that's found in the first verse of the next chapter (Romans 8:1) and really goes along with our previous reading. It says, "There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit." This secret will give us freedom we might never have expected!

Jerry D. Ousley is the author of ?Soul Challenge?, ?Soul Journey?, ?Ordeal?, ?The Spirit Bread Daily Devotional and his first novel ?The Shoe Tree.? Visit our website at spiritbread.com to download these and more completely free of charge.

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