Marriage: Rev Up Your Sex Life
by Angie Lewis 9/25/2007 / Marriage
A popular misnomer in married life is that "all husband's want from their wife is sex" and "all wives are cold and unresponsive". Well, it's not true. The fact is most women very much enjoy sex, it is just that a woman may need a little bit more coddling and kissing before the actual act of intercourse is introduced, but so what! What's so hard about making your wife happy?
You see, a man can just "think" about having sex and he is ready to have sex. A woman needs more than just the "thought" in her mind, she prefers to be touched and massaged for a while first. If you do this, I can almost guarantee your wife will be coming to you for sex not the other way around. So quit complaining about the lack of sex in your marriage do something about it!
What makes a woman not seem to be too thrilled about sex is that her man is not being very helpful when it comes to making sure that she is ready to actually have intercourse. If a husband is not putting in the extra effort to make sure his wife enjoys herself, then sex to her will be a chore, like doing the dishes. Is that how you want your wife to regard sex with her husband? Ladies being assertive with your husband about what you like is a plus in the bedroom.
A husband who often ejaculates prematurely can leave his wife feeling discouraged and frustrated. A husband can remedy premature ejaculation by waiting to have intercourse until his wife is ready by adding an additional ten minutes to the lovemaking with some activity that is going to give his wife stimuli as well as him. Get creative with your spouse and learn to enjoy every minute of intimacy that you share together.
I think it would be advisable for all married couples to show each other where their pleasure zones are and rev up their sex life. Couples should not be shy about such intimate matters. You deserve to understand one another; it is part of what marriage is all about. I believe if couples would learn to be assertive with one another it would cut down infidelity in marriage by more than half!
Think about this, why would a husband or wife go outside the boundaries of their marriage in the first place? Because they "think" the grass is greener somewhere else. But the truth is, the grass is never greener anywhere else; it is a trick that the mind plays with you. Couples only need to water their own grass so it will become exquisite, that's all. Get your watering can out and start watering!
Another area that is often misinterpreted by the wife is if a man is physically tired, unhealthy, overweight, or just plain strung out, it can interfere with his erection or from keeping an erection. It does not matter what age he is, whether he is in his twenties or eighties, it is a fact of life.
What some women don't understand is this malady has nothing to do with them, but more with the physical ability and emotional state of the man. Unfortunately, many wives take this to mean their husbands don't find them attractive, and they end up fussing over it, hurting the man's ego in the process, which can interfere with the next bedroom episode.
Ladies, understand that physically speaking, a woman is always ready for sexual intercourse, but a man, if he is not in that great of shape, or his ego has been bruised by the lack of performance before, it can keep him from having erections. This is why some men go to pornography and or commit adultery, or use medications that supposed to help in that area.
A man has to be ready physically and mentally. If the mental is not there, he will have a difficult time coming to his full capacity. I am not defending a man's sexual immorality but it's reality, and reality has to be said for better understanding in this area. Couples need to learn to express themselves assertively without hurting one another in the process, its called productive communication.
I feel that a wife can remedy this situation by understanding it better and changing her attitude in the bedroom. If you have somehow made your husband feel incapable as a man, he needs his ego built back up by the woman he loves. Throw away the viagra most men do not need that drug they only need to have a better mindset about their ability and of course, being healthy physically doesn't hurt either.
Ladies, be good to your man, don't give him any reason to want to veer away from his queen. Let him be the king of his domain, so he will want to pamper you with his manly gentleness and love. Men, I believe it wouldn't hurt for you to start expressing your feelings more with your wife. Talk to her don't close yourself off. She wants to please you but if you won't tell her how you feel, how can she?
Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. (Proverbs 5:15 NIV