When you decided to accept the proposal of marriage you, in effect, are saying to your husband to be: 'I am willing to spend the rest of my life with you, despite your known and unknown flaws.' You accept that he is only human and though you expect certain things from him, he may never be forthcoming. Still, you choose to love him. Therefore you have clothed yourself with love; that which is not of lust or brotherly love.
Love that says:
'I love you without condition.
And this love I have for you will ignite the forgiveness in me when you wrong me; Love that will make me get on my knees for you instead of telling the world how worthless you are
For this reason, I accept that:
My marriage is not sex;
My marriage is not the same as that of my parents;
My marriage is not the same as that of my friends;
My marriage is not the same as that of the people in 'Hollywood';
My marriage will bring laughter and tears
I accept that:
I will sometimes hurt in silence, for only God alone will understand and to relate to others outside of my marriage will only put you (my husband) in a difficult position, one I will later regret, once we make up;
Some of the pain that you will bring me can only be healed by you and God;
The hurt will sometimes make me wish I was still under the care of my parents. But at that point, I will remember and renew the vows we made and choose to love you instead of leave you.'
In accepting the above, we recognise and accept that our marriage is a ministry. So here's what I'll recommend we do on a daily basis: Say 'I Will:
Seek the Lord's direction for my marriage;
Pray for my husband;
Pray with my husband;
Cover my husband under the blood of Jesus Christ;
Learn about my husband's likes and dislikes;
Minister to the heart of my husband;
Tell my husband that I love him;
Prepare a meal for my husband;
Maintain our home;
Care for our child/ren: administering to their physical, mental and spiritual needs;
Administer to my husband's spiritual, mental, emotional and physical needs.'
2008 J.S Ramkissoon
I was asked to share with the women's group at my church last year (2007) on the topic of Total Surrender/ Submission. This article was written as part of this presentation and is now made available to help you in enhancing your marriage.
Janice, a freelance writer, lives in the UK and enjoys spending time with her husband, Vince and their son, Javin. She uses her gift to encourage others towards a deeper relationship with God, through her inspirational pieces while her travel articles provide general advice for the holiday-maker.