Garbage Woes and Other Marital Blues
by Donna Haug 11/24/2006 / Marriage
“Honey, it’s Wednesday. Don’t forget to take the garbage out.”
“Honey? Did you hear me?”
“Yeah! Yeah! I heard you!”
Fifteen minutes later …
“Did you put the garbage out yet?”
“Would you stop nagging at me? I told you I’d do it!”
Thirty minutes later and the garbage is still sitting there!
a) Yell at him and remind him that he forgot until it was too late last time. Tell him he is a good for nothing, lazy bum. And then take the garbage out by yourself in a huff.
b) Stand in the doorway and give him the evil eye until he finally notices you and growls, “Leave me alone!” And then, take the garbage out by yourself in a huff.
c) Smile sweetly at him and say, “It’s okay, honey. I’ll do it!” And then, take the garbage out by yourself in a huff.
d) Ignore the garbage and hope he remembers in time this week.
Let us face it, ladies. Our lovely prince charming sometimes forgets how to be charming. So, what do we do when we feel down in the dumps about our husbands? How can we get them to deal with the garbage when they really don’t want to without nagging?
I have no idea!
However, I know what not to do. I know that options ‘a’ through ‘c’ are not good ideas. I also know that option ‘d’ may be his favorite option but may be rather optimistic, depending on the husband.
As frustrated as we may get with our husbands, what we do not want to do is become contentious women. Nagging women who are always harping at their husbands make life miserable for everyone around them. Solomon seems to agree with this idea. Proverbs 27:15-16 (NKJV) says, “A continual dripping on a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike; Who ever restrains her restrains the wind, and grasps oil with his right hand.” With all of the wives he had, Solomon must have had enough harping women around to make him feel like he was in Paradise – or not.
So, if we do not want to be like that, what can we do? My guess is that our best option would be to treat him like a man instead of a child. A frank talk at an appropriate time may be effective. We can talk about how it makes us feel when we have to do everything alone. WE may discuss dividing the chores among us. If we are “stay-at-home” moms, that list may be divided differently than if we are working full time outside of the home. However, we need to discuss openly what each other’s expectations are and agree. Maybe we even need to ask him, “How can I remind you about something I think you may have forgotten without annoying you?” We all want to live together in harmony, and yet certain obligations must be dealt with – like garbage.
However we resolve our differences, we must be on our guard. Let us make this our prayer today: “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer.” (Ps. 10:14 NKJV)
Donna Haug is a missionary wife and mother who loves to write. She has spent much of her life overseas. As a result, her writings have a 'down to earth' quality to them and quite often an international bent. Check out the latest on the Haugs at www.thehaugs.com