"I bare him in sorrow" I Chronicles 4:9(d).King James Version(KJV).

A man was once a boy ; he was even once a baby. A bouncy baby boy will one day become a big boy and later a big man. This growth comes from God, the Creator.

In the process of this growth, people around a man (boy) play significant roles in his life. These roles affect what will happen to him and his behavioral pattern.

Today, the complaint of many parents about a misbehaving child is peers influence. They complain bitterly about this to the extent that they prevent their children from having friends. No gainsaying the fact that peer influence has direct effect on a child's behavior but what effect can peer influence have on a baby?

Virtually none! There are certain habits that are born with a child, they were inherited from his mother or father or from both. This is another title /topic enterely for another day.

Now to the special part which is parental Influence on a child which is the purpose of this piece, there are certain circumstances that affect and influence what a child does and what happen to him. An example is the statement that opens this article, "I bare him in sorrow."

What is the complete statement made out of which the text was extracted? It runs thus,
"There was a man named Jabez who was more honorable than any oo his brothers. His mother named him Jabez because his birth" had been ss painful." I Chronicles 4:9. New Living Translation. (NLT).

Jabez was so named because of the "pain" suffered by her mother on the day he was born. Birth pains are suffered by every mother. Was Jabez the originator of birth pains? No! It started by the words of God to the first woman in the garden of Eden in Gen 3:16 thus,
"I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy,and in pain you will give birth."

This points to the fact that birth pains are not peculiar to the birth of Jabez. So, there is no reason for his mother to captalise on this to tarnish his destiny.

Going by the rendering of the same verse by original king James Version, we ready
"... because I bare him with sorrow."

Sorrow has some pains but the former seems to be wider than the latter. Her sorrow may be connected with his birth as much as it may not be directly connected with child birth. Her emotions had been attached to Jabez's total being. It affected his total manliness, in other words, it has direct effect on his destiny. Jabez in destiny, "... was more honorable than any of his brothers." it is sad that parental sorrow or pains almost destroy this man's destiny. Thanks to God of Abraham Who opened his eyes of understanding to know and take the right steps. A woman wounded her destiny, so, he took it to Destiny Moulder, he said,
"oh, that you would bless me and expand my territory!
Please be with me in all that I do, and keep me from all trouble and pain!" I Chronicles 4:10.

These requests were granted by God of Israel in whom he trusted. He was able to fulfill his great destiny.

Are you a parent? Can you take some moments to ponder on what transpired by the time you gave birth to each of your children? Have you not wounded your children's destinies by your words at their births? Are your words not influencing your children misbehavior?

Words has power!

Jesus reveals,
"The spirit alone gives eternal life. Human effort accomplishes nothing.
And the very words I have spoken to you are spirit and life." John 6:63.

As it is with Jesus Christ, so it is with those who are right with their God. Many times those who do not know Christ utter certain words and it is established in the spirit realm for many reasons too numerous to be stated here.

Therefore, please, be very careful and watch those words coming from the two doors of your mouth. They can have direct effect, positively or negatively on you and all who are yours, including your children. Do not allow your pains or sorrows to take a serious toll on you to the extend that you become a destroyer of destinies.

Please, once again watch!

On the other hand, do you observe that your destiny has been wounded by parental words, there is a hope for you. Take your wounded destiny to your Maker for repairs. He will accept you and do the right thing to your destiny that has wounds. You will then rejoice at last if you have, smooth relationship with Him.

"The father loves the Son and has put everything into his hands.
And anyone who believes in God's Son has eternal life. Anyone who doesn't obey the Son will never experience eternal life but remain under God's angry judgment" John 3:35-36
Stay blessed and prepared for the imminent coming of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Note: What applies to a man do to every female. So this piece does not concern only men. Scriptures quoted are from New Living Translation except otherwise indicated.

The Author is the set man of CTFM(WORLD OUTREACH)and Presiding Pastor of Christ Restland Gospel Church.He is a Poet and author of many books. Visit his blogsites www.4thlink.wordpress.com and www.peacelink.wordpress.com for more quality contents.