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For the Jewels Baby
by Chris White "Momma, what are you doing?" Savannah was sitting at her vanity putting on a full face of makeup which CaRe knew was not the norm. "Where are you going? I can see you're all dressed up to go somewhere. What's up?" Savannah answered not missing a beat putting her makeup on,"Daddy's job is having a holiday party and he asked me if I would go with him." CaRe made a face, "Momma, now I know you do not want to go to no stupid job holiday party of Daddy's, you don't like crowds, you don't drink or smoke, you're not into the business arena and.. he " her voice just trailed off as she looked at her feet. She hated her feet. In reality there was nothing wrong with them other than being on the large or long side, which you couldn't tell with her statuesque height. She looked from her feet to her mothers. "I could never wear those shoes, not that I would want to. I'd fall two steps into them" Savannah looked at CaRe. "Mz. CaRe, I know where this is going. You have beautiful feet. So what if they are a little long, have you forgotten how tall you are? How beautiful you are? How smart and talented you are?" CaRe sighed as she always did when Momma said these same things to her love, her 1st born daughter. If only CaRe knew just how much Savannah had rubbed her belly and prayed daily over her life from the moment her birth was confirmed. If only CaRe knew how devotedly she spoke God's Word over her 1st born. "When I was your age, missy, I was no more thinking about heels than I was playing basketball like your sister Jewel." Savannah picked up her blush brushes checking to see if they were clean. "It took me many many years to even want to wear heels, dear. I simply so no need to!" Savannah chuckled which made Care relax and smile, though concern was still present. "Baby girl, I didn't like myself for many years. And you know, I didn't realize this but it's a perfectly normal thing for a large percentage of us women. Though there are some have had the distinct honor of missing that boat and grow up secure liking themselves from birth. But that group is much smaller." Care shrugged. Savannah knew she was still too young to understand. She remembered how she herself was the same way. "Momma, why do you do it?" Savannah knew where this conversation was going but pretended she didn't for a moment. "I told you, honey, it's just to enhance your look for a more glam' style for the evening out loo..." Care broke in before she could finish,"Momma, you know that is not what I meant." Savannah could see she was staring at her with those big beautiful eyes that melted her heart and made her so sad she couldn't give her everything that she desired. Savannah slowly finished up her makeup and stood up. Care hoped that one day she would have the same poise her mother did and look so beautiful, especially after all she'd been through. Savannah walked to the closet to find a shawl that would match her dress. "Why, Momma, when you can't go anywhere by yourself and if you do you don't have any money. Why, when it has to be Daddy's way or no way. You can't get a job because you already have a full time one here. I see how hard you try Momma and I'm tellin' you, my husband betta kno' how to cook or" Savannah jumped in, "O hush girl, you too young to understand and..." Care piped back in, "what about the grown folk who" Savannah knew where she was going, "sweetie, I got tired a long time ago of trying to live my life to meet others expectations. God cured me of that for sanity and purpose sake a long time ago. When they grow up they will understand and not a minute sooner. Their judgment of my life or faithfulness is between them and God. The true saints should be praying for me. As for the rest of them baby? Well they're just showing how not grown up they are and that they need my prayers more than I need theirs. And that is the end of that." Savannah could see she had one last question on the matter,"But how can you go to service and know those who are talking and making judgments about you?" Savannah looked into Care's eyes and said," Because I honestly love them and know they don't mean to deepen the pain in my life. God is not done with them either, baby. And they are my spiritual family, wrong, mixed up or right. And you know, not all of them are talking, some are honestly just praying for me that I get through this difficult time. As much as it hurts to be misunderstood I love them even though I know that some will always talk about me. It is where God has placed me and I know that. My heart is connected there baby. My assignment is not done." Savannah seemed to drift off a moment and then continued in a soft voice, "I can't imagine another assignment" Care seemed to have one more question. "Momma, how do you do it?" Savannah laughed. "Isn't that how we started this conversation?" Care demurely smiled and said, "Yeah, but you didn't really answer me." She looked at her mother again with those big dark brown eyes. "The bottom line Ms. Care is I do what I do at home and at church because I know without a doubt my name is written down in the lambs book of life and that heaven is where my treasures are. Life down here baby, is just a rehearsal. It's our practicing ground, you know? Everything we do is for learning sake. Everything we acquire is as a steward, to learn to manage wisely. So to fight for my way down here is not important. That's not a power move. The power move is to understand that my way is insignificant. Every time I move from that place is more jewels in my crown baby, jewels in my crown. She found the shawl she thought would best fit the dress, wrapped it around her shoulders. Hugging her 1st born love daughter with head up and shoulders straight, she very elegantly left to fulfill her role as wife, oh and add more jewels to her crown. C Tracy - I am married, have raised 4 children & have lived in Bay Area of Calif. most of my life . I love to write. My writing is all faith driven and Christ centered as "in Him, I live, move and have my being." My writing is mostly fiction loosely based on real life accounts. Article Source: http://www.faithwriters.com |