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A Big Bang Theory
by Kaylee Blake Kyle-Christian on secular college campus Amy-Unbeliever, undecided in the Creation/Evolution debate Professor Smith-Unbeliever, teaches in the Sciences, Evolutionist Student-an extra Props: desk/table, paper, pencil, eraser, science book, something that resemble dynamite (Kyle is methodically placing items on a desk/table, in this order: paper, pencil, eraser, science book, dynamite. Amy, worried after seeing the dynamite, runs up to Professor Smith who was speaking to a student.) Amy: Professor! Professor Smith, one of the other students just pulled out a stick of dynamite! I think hes going to blow something up! Professor Smith: What?! Where is he? (Amy leads Professor Smith to Kyle. Kyle looks up.) Kyle: Hey! You guys are just in time. I was just about to start my science research paper. Ya wanna watch? (picks up a match) (Professor Smith approaches Kyle very slowly, hands making pleading gestures. Amy stands back fidgeting nervously.) Professor Smith: OK, Kylejust hand over the dynamiteplease. Just give it to mewe dont want anyone to get hurt Kyle: But how am I supposed to write my research paper without it? Professor Smith: Oh, well find a wayjust hand it to me (Kyle sighs as he places the dynamite in Professor Smiths hand.) Professor Smith: and the match (Kyle hands over match.) Amy: (relieved) Whew! That was too close for- (Professor Smith interrupts Amy by placing dynamite and match in Amys hand. Amy is scared and holds objects carefully, away from body.) Professor Smith: (takes a deep breath) All right now, Kyle. (forced calmness) Lets just sit down right over here(leads Kyle to the stage steps and they sit down; Amy hovers behind them) Now, I have a few questions for you. First of all, how are you feeling? Kyle: Finewhy- Professor Smith: (interrupting Kyle) Secondly, what did you hope to accomplish by blowing up your textbook? Kyle: I told you already. To start the research paper that you assigned. You know, the one about the origins of the earth? Professor Smith: (looks blankly at Kyle) You need dynamite to write a research paper? Amy: (leans towards Professor Smith and speaks in loud whisper) Lets remember, he was homeschooled; he was already messed up when he came to the universityI hear that hes one of those Christians, too Kyle: (ignores Amy, speaks to Professor Smith) Well, I figured that if I just gathered all the ingredients that make up a research paper together and added a spark (gestures to dynamite) then (yells with dramatic flair) BANG! Id have an A+ paper. (Professor Smith and Amy stare at Kyle in unbelief for a few moments. Then they turn to each other and speak in stage whisper.) Amy: Like I said Professor Smith: I knew someone couldnt possibly be mentally stable if they were going to blow up their textbook with a stick of dynamite, but I had no idea(thoughtful pause)we need to be very gentle with him. (Turns to face Kyle) Kyle, its true that you assembled all of the necessary components that make up a good research paper, but blowing them all up will not automatically arrange them in an A+ paper. Kyle: Oh. (appears to consider this) Maybe an A- paper, then? Amy: (speaking as if to a child) No, Kyle. It will just make a big mess. And playing with dynamite could even hurt you and others. Didnt your mommy ever tell you that? Professor Smith: What you need to make a good research paper (taps his/her own head) is your mind. You need to intelligently arrange all the information you have gathered in a concise manner. Kyle: (slyly) So, even though I had all of the right stuff, I still need some sort of intellectual orchestration to make it a good research paper, right? Professor Smith: (smiles in relief) Yes, that is right. Amy: Yeah, you understand. Thats great, but (with curiosity) I would like to know, where on earth did you get the idea that blowing up all that stuff would give you a research paper? Kyle: The Professor. Amy and Professor Smith in unison: Amy: The Professor?! Professor Smith: Me?! Kyle: Well, yeah. didnt you say, Professor, that life began millions of years ago when all of the chemistry and ingredients that make up life came together and were set off by some spark? Professor Smith: (uncomfortably) Well, Iumyes Kyle: So naturally, I assumed that same thing could occur to make a good research paper. But the Professor straightened it all out for me. He/She proved that there is a God. Just like I have to use my intelligence to create a research paper, there must have been some intellectual Being who gathered all of the components of life together and arranged them in a concise manner. Professor Smith: (sits uncomfortably, shifting in seat. Starts to speak several times, but always stops self. Finally, stands up and speaks coolly) I really must be going now. But Ill have you know, Kyle, that Im going to report to the dean this whole dynamite incident, including your disrespectful attitude to me. Ill see you in class tomorrow. (pivots heels and stomps off stage) Kyle: (turns to Amy) Was it something I said? Amy: (thoughtful) Yeah, I think it was. (a slight pause) Youre one of those Christians arent you? Kyle: (smiles) Yeah, Im a Christian. Amy: You know, Im still not convinced that youre mentally stable (looks down at dynamite in hands), but you made a good point. Ive never really thought this whole evolving-over-millions-of years-big-bang-theory thing was ever realistic. But I always thought the Holy-Being-creating-the-earth scenario was just as weird. Youve given me a lot to think about. Kyle: If you ever have any questions or wanna talk about it, Im sure I can give you more food for thought. Amy: (smiles) I think Id like that. I always enjoy a good debate. Well, Ive gotta go now. See ya, Kyle! (starts to walk off stage) Kyle: See ya! (starts to walk in opposite direction, but pauses and then turns around) Amy, wait! Can I have my dynamite back? (runs after Amy) Kaylee Baracskai is a teen from Northeast Ohio. She enjoys writing fiction, mostly about issues teens today face, skits, biblical fiction, historical fiction, and the "hard, but real" topics in life. http://www.faithwriters.com/member-profile.php?id=20313 Article Source: http://www.faithwriters.com |