To a Dating Couple Outrageous Ideas on Sex Before Marriage Series
by Marijo Phelps 2/21/2010 / Christian Living
I had prayed for over two years for "whoever he was, wherever he was". I met him earlier than I realized he was the one that the Lord Jesus was speaking about to my heart. Yes, he was a bearded red head and I was actually avoiding him. Been there, done that and was not about to get close to ANOTHER bearded redhead. Well, seems like the Lord has a really good sense of humor.
We were both at Youth With a Mission in Texas. The computer software guys chose to use my computer to work on in downloading new software for the whole office and I was in the mail room, for a week, doing a bulk mailing. And Mick, well, he just happened to be in the mail room too building new mail boxes .
The Holy Spirit nudged my heart quietly posing a couple of questions: "are you going to ignore him all week or talk to the guy? He is not your ex-husband." And "Mick needs a godly, non-romantic relationship with a woman, will you be that woman?"
Both questions made me feel like a little kid. Here comes Daddy with the Castor Oil you suspected it was "good for you" but knew how awful it tasted. Eventually you stood still and opened up because you knew your dad really did have your best interest in mind.
From the title of this piece you might have already guessed that we did talk that week in the mail room. We went to a mutual friend's birthday party and he walked me back to the girl's dorm afterwards. I cooked pizza for his roommates in the guy's staff house after he and I got the groceries together.
After doing things in groups of friends he had asked me out to Chinese food and a movie. We were going out regularly, still doing things with him roommates and mine too. The Lord was still saying "godly and non-romantic. With His help we were doing that. And our friendship was growing.
Both of us had made a mess of things before this time and before Jesus. Neither of us was born teething on a Bible and we both had come the hard way around, both were divorced, had lived with a mate without the benefit of marriage and on. We were in our 30s at the time we met.
All of this to say that our Lord Jesus Christ can even restore one's innocence and help in "doing it right"! We were in the process of discovering this. It was as fresh as a breath of Texas springtime air.
Daughter, I've called you both by My name and you're mine. I AM a jealous God guard your hearts and you shall be blessed in My victory. I have sent you the Comforter and strength and power in my Spirit use it. Resist the enemy and he shall flee. Press in to me fervently.
If need be, structure your times together. Avoid areas of temptation, touch not the Lord's anointed, but build each other up in the holy faith. Speak to each other in psalms, songs and praises. You both are my beloved and I Am yours.
Do not get ahead of my timing but meet these challenges head on. I love you two dearly and want your highest good have that prayerful regard for each other moment by moment.
Choose to walk now do not run into what you have not seen or do not know.
I AM with you. Are you with Me? I delight in you two and want you to be exquisitely blessed by the friendship I've given you keep it now where it belongs for the maximum for you both. Pray much. Submit each other to Me and your emotions/wills/hopes/fears/futures and do it today. I want your highest but you must both yield to Me and stay yielded. You're missing out on a lot because you're leaning too far.
Check yourselves for My sake and as a token of your care/concern for each other. I will supply strength as you step out and act as you know you need to. Receive the precious gift of friendship I have given you don't gobble. Guard your heart.
Song of Solomon 8:4
Promise me, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right. (NLT)
We were taught that the right time was after you had made the commitment of marriage to each other. And I do not regret being taught this at all. God graciously gave us a new beginning. But I am getting ahead of my story. At this point we had not shared so much as a kiss. I was finding that flowing the Lord's leading in a friendship was totally delightful.
The best thing was that at this early stage, before our emotions were too involved. Did you know emotions make really effective "ear plugs" when you are praying and trying to hear the Lord? SO pray much, pray early, pray before and LISTEN.
What better "match maker" could there be than your savior who "knew you BEFORE your mother's womb". We were just beginning to find out.
(C) Marijo Phelps all rights reserved. Use with proper credits.
Saved by His grace in 1974, from 9 years of professing atheism into His loving arms. RN for 23 years, missionary with YWAM then statistical analyst for Every Home for Christ over 9 years. Living with my husband in the middle of a mountain meadow. GRIN! Wanting to spread the good news