Turtle Book Prequel Outrageous Ideas About Sex Before Marriage Series
by Marijo Phelps 2/28/2010 / Marriage
Mick had a son from a former relationship. Actually I got to know the baby before I had even spent time with his daddy. This little redheaded toddler had stolen my heart as he came into the office where I worked. I had no cubical and was at the end of the hall, in the hall, by the snacks. Mick's son would come in with his adoptive mom or his "nanny" who'd have other business in the place and he would make a bee-line for my end of things and the snacks. I'd clean him up after the chocolate attacked him and then we'd fly down the hall; me the motor and the little guy my "airplane".
As I got to know his father, I noticed how they both has the same swagger, the incredible blue eyes the gorgeous red hair -yes, by this time I liked red heads again.
The front of the story is not pretty. The back of the story is that Mick Had come to Jesus and was changed totally. I only knew the changed Mick, I didn't know him before. His son was adopted by his maternal grandparents at a time when neither his mom nor Mick could take care of him. Mick was newly in a Youth With a Mission rehab in New Jersey when the baby was born. Yes, there was forgiveness. Wisdom said the couple should not get married, they didn't. Mick was totally delivered from drugs, from alcohol and serving the Lord with his whole being. One of the costs of that was being unselfish enough to sign away his parental rights when he was not able to provide a home for his son allowing the grandparents that joy.
We were at a ladies Bible study, the speaker had asked us to be quiet before the Lord and allow Him to nudge us if there was anyone we needed to ask to forgive us. The night before, I had been playing cards with some of the men in the guy's staff house. Yes, they were goofing off Brian and Mick were looking in the mirror behind me trying to see what my cards were. I made the smart remark that the next "field trip" (short term mission outreach) the group currently in school should take would be to the guy's staff house.
Listening to that speaker the Lord kind of broke my heart. I was being pretty nasty with that comment and needed to ask forgiveness. Clean up duty that day was mine and Mick's son was there I played with the toddler and had a great time. He begged me to play airplane and who was I to say no. Afterwards, I needed to go and talk to Brian and Mick.
The lady who doesn't usually cry found Brian first. I told him I was wrong, actually pretty snotty and asked him to forgive me. He did. He gave me a hug as I got his shoulder soggy.
Then Mick came out. I needed to get out of the staff house so asked him if we could talk for awhile.
His answer was "Sure" and we went outside. I repeated my apology asking forgiveness again.
"I forgive you. Marijo"
He had once told me that he didn't think people should jabber and jabber unless they had something important to say. My ex-husband used to give me the silent treatment for days on end, except maybe to say "pass the salt". I cringed when Mick had said that. Today he was talking not stop, so was I.
"I thought you were the guy who said people shouldn't talk unless they had something important to say?"
"Well, we always have important things to say, don't we?"
Mu grin must have been so big that it went right off my face! Then he shifted gears "I need to tell you something, I have a son." He spoke very hesitantly. It was known the baby was adopted. What was not general knowledge was who biological his parents were.
Oh, my, I couldn't sit and listen to him painfully pour out his story when I already knew it. I also didn't want him to think I was cutting him off what to say?
Softly I said "I know, Mick, I spent the last hour and a half playing with him."
"How do you know? Not many people know who his parents are?"
"Well, let's just say one of your roommates has kind of a big mouth.."
I then encouraged him to share his heart with me. By this time we were into the woods behind the guy's staff house. There was a seat removed from an old van, we sat down. Mick told me later it was then he knew that we were going to get married. That day, as we sat down on the old van seat and talked some more. we hadn't even been out together yet. I am not sure if he had a "word" from the Lord or if he was just thinking but to this day if you ask him when he knew that we would get married that is the scene he describes. All I can say is that God is SO good.
The following are more of the teachings that were shared. They were strong Biblical teachings on relationships. From where Mick and I had both been, we could use some help. These teachings became the building blocks of our relationship.
There was a moral slide in the US in the 1970s and we have kept on sliding since then. In Revelation and Daniel "righteous become more righteous and the wicked become more wicked" in the last days.
"All it takes for evil to prevail is for good men/women to do nothing"
Hebrews 1:8-12 (New International Version)
8But about the Son he says,
"Your throne, O God, will last forever and ever, and righteousness will be the scepter of your kingdom.
9You have loved righteousness and hated wickedness; therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions
by anointing you with the oil of joy." 10He also says, "In the beginning, O Lord, you laid the foundations of the earth,
and the heavens are the work of your hands.11They will perish, but you remain; they will all wear out like a garment.
12You will roll them up like a robe; like a garment they will be changed. But you remain the same, and your years will never end.
God loves righteousness. So the ruling motive of our hearts should be "what does God desire?" You aren't so "special" that you get to cut corners but you are just as special as any saint through the ages.
There is a possible direct correlation between immorality plus personal and parental divorce in society and teenage suicide. Enslavement to sex will lead to more emotional chains than physical ones.
Sex is NOT the bitter fruit of the fall. God first created the body and then breathed a soul into it so God is not "down" on the body.
Whenever we break God's standards consequences follow and they hurt us whether we realize it at first or not.
Some of these writings are based on a lecture series called Sex and Dating by Dale Crall and are used with his permission. Thank you Dale!
(C) Marijo Phelps all rights reserved. Use with proper credits.
Saved by His grace in 1974, from 9 years of professing atheism into His loving arms. RN for 23 years, missionary with YWAM then statistical analyst for Every Home for Christ over 9 years. Living with my husband in the middle of a mountain meadow. GRIN! Wanting to spread the good news