How Should a Christian Husband Submit to His Wife?
by Angie Lewis 12/14/2010 / Marriage
A husband does not submit to his wife in the same implication that we know what the word means. Instead the husband is commanded, "to love" his wife. If a husband does not love his wife in the proper ways, according to God's principles, then the wife will be reluctant to submit her will to her husband. This sets off much resentment, anger, and confusion for couples in marriage.
A husband loves his wife, he does not submit to her as being under her headship. That is not how God created the sexes. The hierarchy works like this: A husband submits to Christ's protection and instruction for him because Christ is the head over the man, hence the man is now able to love his wife properly. In marriage the wife submits to her husband's protection and loving guidance for her because her husband is the head over her, hence the marriage is complete and whole in Christ, not of the world.
A wife should never demean, boss or belittle her husband because this can harm his manhood in the long run and I believe is part of the reason for so much sexual promiscuity from husbands. Where is the respect? Did you know that God commands a wife to respect her husband and he commands that a husband love his wife? So what do you think is going to happen if the wife constantly disrespects her husbands manhood through her dominate and bossy behavior? Ephesians 5:25 and Ephesians 5:33
God gave us the principles we need to have wonderful, fulfilled marriages! Now all we have to do is put the principles to work in our lives! Ironically, all relationships need to have submission in place because submission is all about respect. You don't have to love your employer to respect him or her. You don't even have to agree with them to submit to their authority, but you do it anyway, or else you would get fired or demoted for insubordination. It is odd how we can submit our will to our employers whom we don't love, but disrespect the man we are married to, whom we say we do love? How much sense does that make?
In any relationship where the levels of authority are not heeded that relationship becomes a dictatorship by either end and that is not the way God intended for His people to live. We are to serve others in Christ, not see what we can get from others. Where there is conflict it is because of the headship and submission being confused. (Philippians 2:4) In fact in a marriage where there is a lot of head butting it is because one or both are not submitting to their God-given role and position.
Mutual submission means peace and harmony among God's people. But a husband submits by loving his wife, while the wife submits by submitting to her husbands love for her. All relationships need to have submission present such as a child to a parent and parent to child friend-to-friend, coworkers to employers and employers to their employees. This is how healthy relationships have peace and harmony and honor God in their marriage and relationships.
All healthy marriages are where the husband is the head of the wife and she is his helpmeet, anything else is a marriage based upon worldly views, ideas, values and morals.
Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy without blemish. (Ephesians 5:25-27)
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husband, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the Savior of the body. (Ephesians 5:22-23)