While God has been very busy in my life, I will admit I was sort of hesitant to share what He was working out in me.
God brought a season of change to my life right after Paul and I were married. A season of beautiful growth, mass confusion, and serene humbleness. Before we found out I was pregnant, God was setting me and my husband up for a baby, me especially, I just knew it. Little things in my life that I had struggled with in the past were finally coming together and under control, God was quiet around me, I had learned and dealt with many things about myself and those around me that prepared me for my next responsiblity and great love in life. A child.
With this child, God also showed me a season of change in my friendships. I am very happy to say that the woman I was in high-school is not the woman I am today; the woman I was in college is not the woman I am today; the woman I was three years ago is not the woman I am today, and the woman I will be tomorrow will not be the woman I am today. Some friends from high school and some friends from college are exactly the same way they were then as they are now. Not to say that is a good or bad thing, but, I believe, it is a personal and spiritual thing. God is always changing us, He is making a new image in us. If we were all the same and stayed at the same pace, life would be pretty boring, and our friendships likewise.
One friendship I had a very hard time letting go of. At one time in my life, what we once had in common, we no longer share. I like the quote T.D. Jakes uses when referring to his reading on "Letting Go." He says, "you've got to know when its over, you have to know when someone's part in your story is over, so that way, you can stop trying to raise the dead"... and I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've tried to raise the dead. Thank goodness for my wonderful husband, he is always a rock I can break myself against. I didn't realize that God was bringing to me brand new friendships and beautiful relationships that He knew I needed and would cherrish. I had to stop forcing myself to try to be the friend I thought some of my friends needed. That even included when friends around me didn't respond to a situation the way I would if it were something in their life. When people don't reach out with overwhelming joy as I would about something, that hurts, but I had to remember that isn't my fault. Who I am is not who they are. My pastor once shared with me that instead of harboring hurt feelings from past relationships (parents, friends, relationships) I should always, every day, channel that hurt and frustration right in to a booming ray of overwhelming love and joy to my husband and my family. Don't you love it when someone else is right? When change happens that does not mean that we stop loving others or that we stop caring, it just means that the paths we choose are different, some intertwine and some never re-connect.
Seasons of change happen all the time in and around our lives. I love all the seasons in my life: they have taught me what and who I am today and what and who I will strive to be tomorrow. My priorities have changed. I was reading in one of my many favorite books last night, A Wife After Gods Own Heart, and the words just about jumped off the pages to me. God wants me, as a wife and mother, to "build my home." And He has surrounded me with friendships, relationships, and the tools to prepare for this season.
"A virtuous wife carefully watches all that goes on in her household...." Proverbs 31:27
Now, do not get me wrong, I don't mean that every woman has to stay at home, be lonely, tend to the house and kids, but, WE ARE and were made to be the home makers. :) My husband and myself included still love to socialize and we make time for our own date nights and evenings with other friends, but, as I said before, priorities change, and God always surrounds us with what and who we need in our lives at the very time we are needing it to prepare great works for Him.
So, with all that said, whatever Season of change you are facing- know it is a season, it will pass, and it will make you a stronger, wiser, and more humble woman. Sometimes we can't always see all the colors because God is continuously perfecting His masterpiece. ; )
I am a young mother of a beautiful baby girl, another one on the way, happily married, and a fearful follower of my God in Heaven. I started sharing my writing with other young women to let them know they are not alone in the trials of life, love, marriage, family and their own walk with God.