Sometimes God says, "Jump" And although you want to say, "No way." The best thing to do is respond with, "Yes father, how high?" This can be the most difficult way to go, but if you make that jump with complete faith, and get through the trials, you will find an amazing reward at the end of each journey.
My husband and I were living in a horrible neighborhood in Southern California a few years back. We were both struggling with some major addictions and getting into more trouble than one person can handle on their own. Our priorities were completely mixed up, and we were heading no where fast. We were trying to justify our sins, making excuses for our lack of change, all the while digging ourselves deeper and deeper into a hole
My in-laws had moved to Oregon a couple years prior, and trying to convince us to make the leap to a new state, in many ways a whole new world as well. I felt deep in my heart that it was something that God wanted for us but I made myself believe that God wouldn't ask so much of us. For a long time I came up with reasons why this was a bad idea. My husband had a great job, I was close to getting hired at a good company, myself. We had lots of friends and I was really close to my mom. I could name reason after reason why we should not move. But I was reluctant to accept the reality that this was a command from God. I was scared.
Well, almost all at once, all our reasons for staying, fell apart. My husbands company began to fail. I was turned down by the company that was so close to hiring me. Our friends turned their backs on us, and my Mom and I stopped talking over a ridiculous argument. It got to the point where we were completely out of excuses. Finally we accepted God's command and said, "Alright God, how high are we jumping?"
In less than three days our apartment was completely cleaned out. We packed up the absolute necessities only. We sold what we could for gas money and we either gave away or threw away the rest. We were all ready to leave when our trials really started!
Satan was definitely trying his best to hold us back. He knew that what God had in store for us was going to be awesome, and Satan did not want that for us. The day we were set to leave, my car, that I had just made a payment on was repossessed. We shrugged it off and used some of our gas money to rent a mini van. Once we were on the road, my two year old son got a sudden fit of car sickness. Once we got cleaned up and he was feeling better, we got lost in northern California. Almost an entire day later, we were back on track, when our front drivers side tire blew out. It was such a powerful explosion that it broke the entire drivers side rear view mirror clean off! As my husband and I were on the side of the road, digging through our belongings for the spare tire, I had a complete emotional melt down. I buried my head in my arms and sobbed like never before. I felt lost, I wanted to turn back, but to where? We left everything, we had nothing. I should have been praying to God for strength, but instead I was cursing my life. I felt like we had made a huge mistake, and I hated myself for doing it. I asked my husband, "What were we thinking?" When suddenly a big white truck pulled up behind us.
A woman with a big golden retriever and an even bigger smile got out and started toward us. After making sure we were okay and didn't need her help, she handed me a little card and quietly told me, "God bless your family."
I settled back into the passenger seat of the beat up mini van and read the orange card out loud. At the very top it read, "Encouragement." And below that, "For the eyes of the Lord range through out the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him." 2 Chronicles 16:9.
For the first time since leaving our small sad apartment filled with discouraging and depressing memories, we both smiled, and we continued on our way! What felt like no longer than an hour later, we pulled up the long rocky driveway, right up to where God had wanted us to be.
Although I knew that this was only the beginning of our new lives, and we had plenty of work ahead; I still felt the first bit of hope, the first bit of peace, and a great deal of confidence in what was to come!
It's never easy to let go of what we think is right in life, and follow God to our leaps in life. Once we are able to put our full faith in the Lord, and do what He wants of us we find that the things He has in store for us is a thousand times better than anything we could achieve on our own!
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance." James1: 2-3.
I haven't been writing for very long but I truly love the Lord and want to share how I feel.