Mother's Unconditional Love
by Cinda Carter 6/22/2013 / Testimonies
It was in the year of August 2006. I had just accepted a job for cleaning apartments at a Seniors Assistant Care Home. Thinking I would never to be able to see my mother again because of my schedule at work. God saw what was to come.
Mom and I were not always on the best of terms. I had never really developed a relationship with her through the years because of decisions I had made concerning my marriage when I was young. While raising my daughter, her and I would always bump heads. She had raised us girls and did her very best. Mom was a stay at home mom. Our family was not a perfect one but there was always the feeling of knowing that we were loved.
Dad went on to be with the Lord in February of 1998 at the age of 72 and mom was left alone to make it on her own. My sisters and I filled in on certain occasions and made trips in to help Mom, either going to the doctor, grocery shopping, cleaning and fixing things around the house. We had some good years that followed after Dad's death.
I was terrified of loosing my mother before amends could be made between the two of us. We had some contention that went on for years, there seemed to be no relief in sight. For years I prayed that God would heal the situation between us.
While I was a teenager, just getting out of High School, Mom became involved in horoscopes and had us girls involved as well. I too, became overly involved with it, more so, than my sisters. During that time because of unforeseen events that came about, Mom had a breakdown. Dad stopped her from reading the books and threw them all away.
Mom was keeping the family together in the forefront for years. Dad had a week-end drinking problem and it just became to much for Mom with all that she had on her shoulders. She put her whole heart into our lives and kept us together as a family without us girls even realizing it. Mom helped us with our homework on a regular basis, cooked, cleaned, washed clothes, hung them out on the line and tried to keep us going, even Dad in her own way.
It wasn't until the breakdown that Dad and Mom turned their lives over to the Lord.
Dad said, "He would never drink again and he didn't."
Mom committed her life to Jesus and us girls accepted the Lord.
Even though the Lord had been working in their lives, I still was in conflict with myself. I left home and got married a year later after graduation. I guess you could say, I was running from the situation at home and ended up jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. In my marriage of eleven years, I became very self centered and I had a lot to learn before the Lord took hold of my life. Which wasn't until 1983. At the age of thirty-one I moved back in with Mom and Dad, I really had no place else to go. At that point some of the healing process began between my parents and myself. I lived with them for at least six years. I met my husband, Jim in February 1989, then married him in May of 1990.
Back to the beginning of my story on why my job was so, vital to the situation.
The first thing in the morning the girls at work would get together and read horoscopes to see what they were. I would spend time with them without really being involved. The Holy Spirit convicted me in such away, while I still continued to be a part of it. I decided not to join them anymore and prepared for the days work. As time went on, one of the girls started ridiculing me in seductive ways. It was in away that the other girls did not realize that she was directing the comments toward me personally. I made a personal stand in the Lord not to follow the crowd, it was a blow to the enemies plan.
During this time, Mom was dying. I just couldn't accept it. I happened to watch a movie about the Dilley Family having sextuplets, who refused to have an abortion in order to save the others. The babies were born on May 25, 1993 but one of the babies was left in the hospital. The mother-in-law thought they should take the crib down until the baby came home. When the father came in and saw that the crib was gone, in faith he claimed it was going back up until the child came home. After a few months the child returned to it's home with the happy family.
How did this movie help me? By taking action! I had bought a hospital bed at a garage sale thinking we may need it someday. Unfortunately, my husband didn't think it would fit in the spare bedroom. I begged to differ. So, while he was at work I went down to the basement and was determined to bring the mattress up the stairs on my own into the bedroom as an act of faith believing Mom would live. The hard part was getting the bed itself out of the basement door to the front door. I prayed, Dear Lord, "Please help me." I noticed the neighbor next door and I called out to him. It was still dark outside and I was wondering if he would even see me or hear me. He heard my cry, then came over. We carried the bed around the other side of house and through the front door to put it in our small bedroom. It fit perfectly. On my part it was an act of faith believing Mom, would eventually get to come to our house so, we could take care of her. I continued to fix up the bedroom with family pictures and added a feminine touch to the room while I waited on the Lord. I guess you could call it faith in action. This is what I determined in my heart.
On February 19, 2007, it would have been Dad's 82nd birthday. I was talking to mom on the phone. At that point she was close to death.
I said, "Please Mom, I need you, don't go; Please, Mom I need you."
She replied, "I need you too."
I said, "Really, Mom?" I was so, pleased to hear her response.
I told her that I would quit my job. On Dad's birthday I had decided to quit. I needed my mother. The curse had been broken, the fear of loosing my mother and because of the reason I left my family the first time had been resolved.
They flew her in a helicopter over to the Evansville Hospital and the doctor's put in a pacemaker. With time, Mom got better. In March 2007, she came to live with us and was able to stay a year and a half until September of 2008. I now have such good memories to reflect upon.
There were times I would say, harsh words. In so doing, she would assure me that no matter what I said, or did, it would not change her love for me. Mom showed me unconditional love. She was a real trooper. Mom loved her family and told me that I did not realize what I had in my husband, Jim. Mom helped save our marriage with good advice. My daughter and our relationship was healed between the two of us.
I cooked for Mom, she was able to get off her insulin nine months within the time span that she stayed with us. We laughed together, we sang, we danced, we held each other, we forgave one another. No one can take away your memories. It was ordained by God. Everything that took place, He worked out for our good and His glory.
Jim and I were no longer able to take care of Mom, it was then that she went to live with my sister up north after loosing her husband of 25 years. Mom's death was a painful one and I would talk on the phone with her on a regular basis. I remember the last words she spoke to me, Mom new she was dying and she said, "I love you" in a weak, low sounding voice. I replied, "I love you, Mom."
I remember praying the day before she died and asking, please Lord, don't let her suffer anymore. The next day she went home to be with the Lord, in August of 2010. I cannot praise, God enough for giving me borrowed time with my Mom on this earth. She meant so, much to so, many different people. Mom had a fight about her and never gave up on family or friends. Even, now with tears streaming down my face, I will always remember my "Mother's Unconditional Love."
Psalm 119: 153, 154, 157, 173, 174, 175 KJV
153: Consider my affliction, and deliver me: for I do not forget thy law.
154: Plead my cause and deliver me: quicken me according to thy word.
157: Many are my persecutors and mine enemies; yet do I not decline from thy testimonies.
173: Let thine hand help me; for I have chosen thy precepts.
174: I have longed for thy salvation, O Lord; and thy law is my delight.
175: Let my soul live, and it shall praise thee; and let thy judgments help me.
176: I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek thy servant; for I do not forget thy commandments.
M other we honor her....
O vercomer in trials and tribulations,
T ruthful for she keeps her word and her obligations.
H elpful to all that needs a helping hand,
E verlasting love through time that stands.
R ighteousness of Christ,
S elfless from start to finish through her life.
L ove that is enduring...
O nly with her love, she's always reassuring.
V isits the lonely whenever she can,
E ternally blessed, with Jesus love she stands.
By: Cinda M. Carter
Dedicated to my mother who has stayed with our family through thick and thin...
May the Lord continue to bless her with His Love and Laughter...Written in May of 2009...
This poem was written when she was in the nursing home. On her birthday of June 27th of this year she would have been 82 but is now with the Lord since August 17, 2010.