Finding Freedom at Last
by Judy Sims 10/07/2006 / Christian Living
Ever find yourself grinding over a past sin? One of those things that haunts you in your sleep, haunts you while singing at church, haunts you during fellowship.
You walk around with this thing inside you, making you feel like you are a fraud sitting in church.
Let me tell you my story. The time the Lord brought me to full freedom.
After straying for several years, I returned to my precious Jesus. I had asked for forgiveness and accepted His promise and yet there was one sin that stayed hidden in my heart. I just couldn't let go.
I carried that around inside of me for almost 2 years, when one night during the Sunday night service, I broke. This thing was crushing me and standing between me and my growth.
You see, it was an abortion. The guilt of murder was all over me. This thing had happened 4 years earlier, and yet now, while trying to grow in the Lord, it would come to me at night.
The same night that I broke down while in the service, I came home with a heavy heart. I began searching the Bible, hoping I could find something akin to my own sin and possibly read how Jesus forgave that same sin. Of course, there is no such story and I knew it. Still, I searched.
I sat on the couch with the Bible in my lap, tears flooding down my face. Suddenly I closed the Bible, laid my head back on the couch and confessed to the Lord what I was up to. I said, "Lord, I confess I've been trying to find justification for what I've done".
I began to pour my heart out to Him, my heart crushing my insides, practically in hysterics. I wasn't finished with my wailing, when the thought, "Deuteronomy 2:24" popped into my head. I dismissed the thought as in interruption and just kept right on with my heart breaking whine scene. The third time that thought popped into my head, "Deuteronomy 2:24", I stopped my whining, picked up the Bible and said, "Ok, already!"
I turned to Deuteronomy 2:24 and began to read. As my eyes scanned over the words, "Cross over.....contend with him in battle.....", I suddenly had a new understanding. I stood up and shook my fist at the devil and said, "Get your filthy, lying hands off my mind. Now! In Jesus name!"
Suddenly, what felt like a warm blanket, started at the top of my head and then spread down my entire body. As this sensation continued, something powerful surged all through me. I felt His warm embrace. It was the most wonderful, most unforgetable, most exhilirating experience of my life.
I was instantaniously free. Freedom such as I had never experienced. It was gone! Just gone! I was floating on clouds and with all the troubles of life, I still walk on those clouds.
This is what satan will do to you. Satan will cling to your sin and hold it to you, reminding you every day. Why does he do this? To rob you. He comes to kill and to steal. He hates you.
When the pounding starts and you feel like an absolute fraud for calling yourself a Christian, and you think it's you that won't let go, remember my words. You are the one with the authority, not satan. Jesus gave you HIS authority. There is power on your very tongue. All you have to do is issue the order and do it in His Name and it is done. No if's, and's or but's. Done and finished, over with, behind you, off the scene.
Now go read Deuteronomy 2:24 and apply it to yourself, today. That is God's desire, that you act like one of His kids. That verse translated to me, is "pull yourself up and act like a My child". It works.
The Lord is on me to share my story, to write for the hurting and to help the confused push away the clouds.
I've begun sharing my writing according to the Lord's timing. He's calling His children.