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Dating the Christian Way

by Janet Riley  
3/10/2015 / Dating


I am trying to date the Christian way. Before I was following Jesus as a adult, I was very self-centered. I dated several men in college, and then went onto to the next one when I was ready, without any real consideration of their feelings.

After my adult commitment to follow Christ, I decided that I was not going to "date" in that way any more. I decided that I was going to ask God to pick out a partner for me. I did not want to wind up divorced like my parents did. The main concept of dating seemed to be a series of relationships, and if they did not work out, you broke off with the person. That did not seem to me a way to learn to have a permanent, committed relationship.

I got impatient, and tired of waiting for God to pick a partner for me. I started to date someone, and God told me that was not the person He had for me. I broke up with him, before our emotions got too involved, and decided to wait. Later, I met my husband at a prayer meeting. At the meeting, God told him that I was his future wife. God told me one week later that he was my future husband.

Knowing that God picked us for each other really helped us over some tough spots in our marriage. My husband loved me for who I was, unconditionally, with all my quirks and faults. I respected him for his love of God and the way God used him to lead us together in life. We were open and honest about each other's medical conditions, finances, and other issues.

Fast forward about 30 years, and now I am a widow. I am going to adopt the same approach, and not "date" just to be going out with men. It is not fair to the man, if I am really not the one for him or if he is not the one for me. I realize this time around God may put someone in my life in a new way, perhaps through some Christian internet dating sites. I am going to be open and honest with anyone that I communicate with. I will not let my emotions control my relationship decisions. I would rather be single than in a marriage God did not want me in.

There is a part inside us that only God can satisfy. We have to be careful to not expect a spouse or any other human to fill that spot. God has to be first, and only then will the relationship be right between friends or marital partners.

(C) Janet Riley, 2014. I know God as a personal God who communicates with us, if we listen. I am starting on a Christian writing career and open to where God leads me. Please review my other articles at FaithWriters. I would like to hear from you. Please email at [email protected].

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