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Should You Answer God's Call If Spouse Says No?

by Annagail Lynes  
3/08/2008 / Christian Living

Should I answer God's call on my life without my spouse's support?

This question reminds me of a preacher who used to be a prominent figure on television until he went astray. He expected his wife to help him fulfill his destiny. God advised this preacher that He had a destiny for the wife to do too. This preacher accepted this because God said it, but I'm sure it didn't sit well with him.

Many men have problems with women in ministry. We have been taught that men are more important to God. We are taught that the only missions of women are to be wives and mothers. They aren't to preach or teach. The preachers cite the Proverbs 31 as their example.

The Proverbs 31 woman cared for her husband and children. She sold her linens in the marketplace, making her an entrepreneur . With her earnings, she considered a field and bought it, making her a land owner. She planted the field as well, which make her a farmer.

More than a wife and mother, The Proverbs 31 woman had her own career. The Bible says she had wisdom to speak to those who came to her for advice. She took care of her family, worked and still had time to be an advice-giver.

The Bible tells us the stories of many prominent women Esther, for example, saved her people by going to her husband, the king, to reveal the plot of an evil man to annihilate the Hebrew people (Esther 7). God appointed Deborah to judge over His people (Judges 4:4). Mary birthed the Messiah (Matthew 1:21). Women helped Paul in the ministry, working side by side with him (Acts 9).

Everyone, male and female, has a role to play in history (Jeremiah 29:11). We were all born for a purpose (Jeremiah 1:5). God fashioned us with the perfect combination of abilities, talents and personality to handle the assignment He gave us.

When He assigned us our tasks, He knew our gender, how much we would weigh, how tall we would be, our race, whether we would be afraid to speak in public or stutter .

Many times we are told by well-meaning family members that we shouldn't fulfill our dreams or follow God's plan for our lives.

"How are you going to make money doing that," "That' just isn't practical. You have a husband and kids," "You will have time enough for that foolishness when you retire" are just some of their complaints.

Our job, our career, is not our source. God is. Yes, we should work, but we shouldn't look to our job as our Source for money, health, security or anything else. That's God's job. Jobs come and go. Pay cuts. Pay raises. Layoffs. Looking for a new job. It is a failing system. God is not. He is stable, security and steadfast.

Doing God's will for our lives is the only way to be happy. If we don't, we will never be fulfilled. Doing God's is not sacrificing money but determining that something else--the saving people from going to hell--is more important than money.

A wife is to be submissive to her husband (Ephesians 5:22, Colossians 3:18). She is to love and honor him. She is to submit to his will, just as a Major submits to the will of a Colonel or Admiral.

However, the Bible says that the husband is to love his wife as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25). Would Christ prevent His Body (the church) from doing the plan of God for their lives? No!

It isn't only men who are unsupportive of their wives doing the plan of God for their lives. Some wives aren't supportive of their husbands doing God's purpose either.

What can we do? Go to God. We should vent our frustration over the situation to Him.

Then ask Him what to do about it. Ask Him to do a work in your spouse's heart as well as your own concerning the situation.

Listen to what God has to say. After you pray in your native language, if you can, pray in tongues (Romans 8:26).

After that, it is time to give the situation over to God. Only He knows how to handle it effectively.

God's will is more important than anything else in your life. God is your Ultimate Boss. It is essential to spend time every day talking to God. He is the only One who knows in complete detail the plan He has for you. By spending time in the Word and praying, you will start to hear God's instructions more clearly.

God called you from the foundation of the Earth. He knew where you would be, what you would be like at this point and time, and He still called you.

In order to please God, you must accept that calling. If someone, such as a spouse, is not supportive of that decision, then pray. Put everything in God's hand and leave the rest to Him.

Annagail Lynes is a pharmacy technician, certified life coach and ordained minister. She is helping people move forward after trauma by helping them discover their purpose. Follow her blog at

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