Oh, my Jesus,
You were there all along.
In the writings of my stormy youth
It was You I lost
You I grieved for without knowing it,
You I left behind,
Not some mortal love waning
But my love for You,
The lover of my soul.
And I wondered at my depression,
Not realizing that it couldn't find relief
Without Your saving grace.
I sought to fill up emptiness of soul
With materialistic mirages
Passing people,unrealistic philosophies
And couldn't understand
Why they didn't fit.
Then I grew to "enlightenment",
And rejection of the Father.
You were there waiting still
How Your heart must have broken,
Yet You steadfastly loved me.
I compounded unbelief and rejection
With experimentation and exploration
Into the highways of worldly pleasure
And You cried a loving tear
Protecting me - so many times my very life
And me refusing, scorning still.
It must have seemed an eternity
Until I'd tried all there was to try
I'd been so many faces and places
There were no numbers left to count them
Restless, searching, seeking to fill
That awful, gnawing emptiness in my soul,
Yet still I wouldn't seek
But argued, scoffed and ridiculed
Those so weak as to believe in god
To say nothing of a personal savior
Who was crucified, dead, buried
And resurrected for me!
And to know that You waited,
Then forgave me, answered me,
And led me into Your Word-
Saved me, changed me,
Let me see and feel and shine
With Your radiant, fulfilling love
That has filled to overflowing
The God-shaped void
Too long dead empty
Within my longing, longing soul.
I'm Yours, I'm Yours completely
Oh, Jesus, patient lover of my soul!!
My blog is: http://myincrediblelord.blogspot.com/
(C) Marijo Phelps all rights reserved. Use with proper credits.
Saved by His grace in 1974, from 9 years of professing atheism into His loving arms. RN for 23 years, missionary with YWAM then statistical analyst for Every Home for Christ over 9 years. Living with my husband in the middle of a mountain meadow. GRIN! Wanting to spread the good news
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